Today, my dog threw up on my bed while I was sleeping. I lost an hour of the day washing the vomit out with a rag, and my garbage disposal jammed on whatever otherworldly things my dog ate the day before. I had to dig it out by hand. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dog had REALLY bad diarrhea. I found that out when I woke up to find it all over my bed. FML
Today, instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakened by the sound of my dog vomiting all over my bed. FML
Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML
Today, my dog threw up on the tiled floor. I found out at 6 this morning in the dark when I slipped and fell in it. FML
Today, my dog woke me up with the sound of vomiting. I immediately got up and tried to figure out what he was doing. After 30 minutes, he didn’t vomit, just kept making the sounds. I banished him from my presence for some more shuteye. FML
Today, I was woken up by a funky smell. My dog had eaten a dead bird and thrown up all over my bed and floor. At 4 o'clock in the morning I had to clean up regurgitated bits of bird, feathers, blood and dog food. The smell still hasn't gone away. FML
Today, I woke up approximately half a nanosecond after my dog involuntarily vomited in bed. On my face. I opened my mouth because it literally filled my nose. I swallowed out of reflex before I was fully awake. FML
Today, I got a new comfy duvet and pillow and was looking forward to a good night's sleep. I got into bed and was followed by my dog, who then threw up the tub of butter he had just stolen from the kitchen onto my brand new bed spread. FML
Today, I discovered my dog pooped in my bed, under the covers, by rolling over onto it. FML
Today, I couldn’t tell that my puppy had an upset stomach before I left for work. I came home to her covered in shit inside her crate. After cleaning her up and almost being done with the mess, my husband found where she had tried to lick herself clean and then vomited it up in our bedroom. FML
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Top comments
Pentium_4 27
man, being a dog would be quite the life. while you're cleaning up the mess they made, he/she is probably relaxing on the couch licking their privates
theWINDOWmonster 3
Why would you put it in the disposal? As opposed to something that makes more sense, like ohh.. the trash?
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Comments (46)
linkinpark98 24
You could have used an unwanted utensil of some sort?.…
getalifepeople91 0
I know how it feels it happened to me
DKool1987 0
Yea Steven Trump says your fired
Unlucky_Gun 0
Should've just washed the sheets your dog barfed on. It would've saved a lot of time
PeguinSpid 1
Oh God, the same thing happened to me a few years back.
RogueWarrior869 23
I'm sorry but, ydi. For one, rags do not go into garbage disposal's, and you lost just an hour of the day? Well, more for the garbage incident, I think. You did at least use some gloves to clean out the disposal, right?
R3kli3 10
And this why I don't keep pets inside my house (:
lemonsquid 6
*Doggy puuuuuuke* :3 hehe
pattipan 7
YDI for owning one of those filthy things to begin with, but also for being so stupid that you did not monitor what garbage that stupid thing was eating. Dogs do not have our level of intelligence. They eat food they should not and eat many things that are not even food because they know no better. If you are going to take on the responsibility for one of these vile creatures, then you have to constantly monitor everything they are doing for their own safety. This is one reason why I would never want a dog; I don't want to waste my life constantly supervising it so it doesn't eat something it shouldn't, chew something it shouldn't, piss or shit on something it shouldn't, et cetera.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Oh my god, not this again.
I_am_original 1
I like dogs more than people like you, just saying. I will happily love upon my wonderful dog I cannot even imagine not having him. At least my dog loves all people, you wouldnt even show the same to such an innocent being, makes the dog better than you
onealmxwilson 18
Like anyone actually cares about your opinion of dogs. Most people love them and have one themselves so why would you post such a long comment explaining why you hate them? It's like asking to be thumbed down and for people to hate you.
u5er_name 2
dude...that goes in the trash, outside. you really want to be tossing puke around where you cook? FYL indeed...