Today, my daughter proudly showed me her new tattoo sleeve, which is made up of an angry cupcake, hemp leaves, and a My Little Pony character. She's almost 30, still unemployed, and still lives in my home. I now have no hope of her ever becoming a productive member of society. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, despite my warnings and knowing I hate them, my wife got a trashy tattoo of an eye on her ankle, like she’s Count Olaf. How is she going to get a job with that thing? FML
Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML
Today, I learned that ever since I got a tattoo, my mother had edited her will, said I was no longer her daughter, and took me out of it. While my sister got a payout, I basically missed out all because of a small tattoo of a flower on my ankle. I’m a single struggling starving mom. She knew this. FML
Today, is the day I got my first tattoo. It's also the day where my mom screamed at me, gave me the silent treatment, and kicked me out of the house. Apparently I’m not considered her daughter anymore, because my skin is “damaged” now. I don’t have other family anywhere, and I have nowhere to go. FML
Today, I finally met my daughter's boyfriend. He has a face tattoo. FML
Today, as yet more proof my useless son is probably going to be living with me well into his adulthood, he has now failed his driving theory test 14 times, despite me studying with him every afternoon. He also has no job, no goals, no girlfriend, and a neck tattoo. FML
Today, my daughter turned Emo. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. I felt good about it, until I told my mom, who was not happy. She responded by taking me out of her car insurance policy, family plan, and charging me for rent every month since I, "wanna be all grown up now.” FML
Today, I finally figured out what I want to do for the rest of my life. Too bad my tattoos will prevent me from ever getting hired. Guess you were right, Mom. FML
Today, my mom found out that I got a tattoo two years ago. She got mad and spanked me. I'm 33 years-old. FML
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Top comments
emeraldisle 30
I would kick her out of she's spending her money on tattoos and not saving for a place of her own.
ryguy83 2
Well... The cupcake does sound pretty cool
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Comments (143)
cheefer 0
You could kick her out. I mean kick her out. Like really kick that ass out of the house like "kick rocks mother ******" is what you would literally say as she's taking a steel-toe to the poonbox.
wironandine 8
Sounds like a winner. Typical hipster these days. How unfortunate.
sailorzoe 14
Tattoos don't make you unemployable. Being a ******* idiot and enabling your 30 year old daughter to be a bum makes her unemployable.
inventindascene 5
Something tells me u have no kids
sailorzoe 14
I'm 22. Why the **** would I have children? That's retarded.
estes816 9
110 So is your profile. Please don't use the word retarted.
plaguer 26
Thanks, 123. Hate when people spew that out knowing it is offensive. And 110, you could have children at 22 because, you know, you've got a damn ****** and all. Hurr durr.
A7X_LoVeee 10
Coming from someone who has tattoos everywhere lol. Where do you work?
VooDooCarrie91 19
110- I am 21 and have two babies. I am quite certain I am not "retarded" and I stand by my decision. Just because it's not something you would choose doesn't make it stupid in any way.
sailorzoe 14
Because there are so many winners that have kids at 22? You guys are RETARDED.
MakeTodayADTR 20
I agree, people take offense to the smallest things. It's retarded.
candacekmp 14
Thats when I would say you have to the end of the month to find a job and start getting your shit together! Where did she get the money for Said sleeve?? Time to make her get herself to grow up... Sink or swim!
sajupt 17
You r a horrible parent. YDI!!!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
You are a horrible speller. GTFO!!!
travishalogod 4
You need to open your mind and realize tattoos are being way more accepted in society than before.
42istheanswer 27
GOOD tattoos are accepted more then they used to be.
sweetmama88 6
I was wondering where she got that idea from.
IsBitchBetter 1
If
twiztedone 19
Seems to be that either you have coddled your child way too much into believing that everything should just be handed to her! I mean come on 30 and still living with mommy and daddy!!? Family is family but sometimes tough love goes a long way! Kick her ass to the curb and make her grow up already!! I do agree the tattoo is not a part of this at all besides spending money on stuff that she doesn't need instead of being an adult and getting her own place and a job.
kitten82 16
she has issues