Today, my daughter proudly showed me her new tattoo sleeve, which is made up of an angry cupcake, hemp leaves, and a My Little Pony character. She's almost 30, still unemployed, and still lives in my home. I now have no hope of her ever becoming a productive member of society. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, despite my warnings and knowing I hate them, my wife got a trashy tattoo of an eye on her ankle, like she’s Count Olaf. How is she going to get a job with that thing? FML
Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML
Today, I learned that ever since I got a tattoo, my mother had edited her will, said I was no longer her daughter, and took me out of it. While my sister got a payout, I basically missed out all because of a small tattoo of a flower on my ankle. I’m a single struggling starving mom. She knew this. FML
Today, is the day I got my first tattoo. It's also the day where my mom screamed at me, gave me the silent treatment, and kicked me out of the house. Apparently I’m not considered her daughter anymore, because my skin is “damaged” now. I don’t have other family anywhere, and I have nowhere to go. FML
Today, I finally met my daughter's boyfriend. He has a face tattoo. FML
Today, as yet more proof my useless son is probably going to be living with me well into his adulthood, he has now failed his driving theory test 14 times, despite me studying with him every afternoon. He also has no job, no goals, no girlfriend, and a neck tattoo. FML
Today, my daughter turned Emo. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. I felt good about it, until I told my mom, who was not happy. She responded by taking me out of her car insurance policy, family plan, and charging me for rent every month since I, "wanna be all grown up now.” FML
Today, I finally figured out what I want to do for the rest of my life. Too bad my tattoos will prevent me from ever getting hired. Guess you were right, Mom. FML
Today, my mom found out that I got a tattoo two years ago. She got mad and spanked me. I'm 33 years-old. FML
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Top comments
emeraldisle 30
I would kick her out of she's spending her money on tattoos and not saving for a place of her own.
ryguy83 2
Well... The cupcake does sound pretty cool
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Comments (143)
perdix 31
Put her picture up on a Brony dating site and maybe one of those weirdos will want to mate with a Pegasister and take her off your hands. Getting a job isn't the only way to be productive. Being a brood mare for the next generation of MLP fanatics surely enriches our society!
krylonpony 3
Giddy up~
weallfml 3
Kick her out...
Fsvb 32
So.. with money did she get it.. Tattoo's are expensive! Especially a whole sleeve :/ Anyway, I would kick her out, but only because she's obviously going to regret this tattoo... Couldn't she pick something over-used but nice like a koi-fish?
GoArmy57 7
Where did she get the money for the tattoo?
KiddNYC1O 22
Petty theft.
Calyx_fml 22
Hemp? Hemp is the name for the non-psychoactive cannabis used to make myriads of consumer products. I highly doubt that she got that tattoo because she wears hemp fabrics and eats hemp seed cereal. She smokes weed like a chimney. Which is probably the reason why she still lives at home with no job watching cartoons for children. Don't get me wrong. I love teh erb too, but I support myself very comfortably. You need to stop funding her weed and tattoo budget and kick her lazy ass out. She'll probably just hook up with some juggalo douchebag and get him to pay for her weed but at least it won't be your fault. Now you are her enabler.
cblock94 7
Props for the pony tattoo but still not the best idea in the long run. Unless it was rainbow dash then it would be 20%cooler
GroovyGravy 7
^this
Taurus_ChicKa 37
I hope you didn't pay for that. I also hope you kick her out. Normally I'm against kicking out "young" people because it's hard for them to make it on their own these days, but your daughter isn't even trying. And as long as you keep giving in to her, she won't try. She's almost 30 and has no job - surely a McDonald's or something is nearby that she could work at. Oh wait, no one will hire her now that she has a huge unhideable tattoo sleeve. Trashy...Kick her out and tell her to fend for herself. If she doesn't straighten up her act, that's her problem. You've raised her long enough.
Kiki242 19
Time to lay down the law. Tell her get a job or get the f*** out.
michelele 0
it's your fault! you should have raised you a real go getter! or got her help when it was needed but don't be discouraged it's never to late!
AznSamoan52 10
That's when you take matters into your own hands and kick your lazy, unemployed, daughter's ass out of YOUR house. She's a full grown adult so you don't have the responsibility of taking care of her anymore. On the other hand, YDI for not encouraging her years before to get a job.