Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
How could you?
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
Bad women's anatomy
Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
Today, I came home to find my boyfriend playing with himself. He got mad and said I "killed the mood". How? By coming home. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Don't knock until you try it
Today, my boyfriend asked me to use a sex toy on him. Am I in the wrong relationship? FML
Needs
Today, I suspected something was up when my boyfriend snuck out of bed after he thought I fell asleep. I caught him jerking to porn in the living room and got really upset. He actually got mad, saying, "I have needs and you never put out and get bitchy when I try." FML
Assumptions
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML
Top comments
Welshite 40
I hope you pointed angrily at his hand.
chocolatefrog28 29
Tell him he's actually the other man, and you're already in a meaningful relationship with your vibrator but you're willing to be friends with benefits.
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Comments (205)
globalgirly33 2
I'd be kicking him to the curb, and fast, because if he's that upset over a vibrator...that's the kind of guy that gets possessive and violent.. Run. Block his calls. Never contact him again.
jbuckets_404 39
I agree!
illinoiscentral 16
OP, if you need more convincing, I agree too.
LandoKid 9
If any guy ever felt threatened, it means even HE doesn't trust what he can do. a woman shouldn't have to give a guy confidence, he should be able to hold himself up.
puppie406 23
That guy is jealous of something thats most likely just plastic and a vibrating piece of metal with batteries like thats pretty low lmao
annie_nk 23
I hear the ones that thrust are awesome. ....Oh, you meant the boyfriend!
calucalay 13
dont feel bad OP it was most likely how he was raised. same thing happened to my brother when his wife found out, then the church got involved. sometimes its best to teach them unless their not willing to learn
SuperStormCindy 8
YDI for having such a stupid SO.
viau 13
what an idiot. im a guy. my gf has one, and its awesome.
Ash7419 5
lmao that's halirious
Tannasgh 22
He needs to grow up.
NineeCat 32
What the heck? Sounds like he is suffering from an extreme case of tinydickitis._.