Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
Today, I came home to find my boyfriend playing with himself. He got mad and said I "killed the mood". How? By coming home. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to use a sex toy on him. Am I in the wrong relationship? FML
Today, I suspected something was up when my boyfriend snuck out of bed after he thought I fell asleep. I caught him jerking to porn in the living room and got really upset. He actually got mad, saying, "I have needs and you never put out and get bitchy when I try." FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
I hope you pointed angrily at his hand.
chocolatefrog28 29
Tell him he's actually the other man, and you're already in a meaningful relationship with your vibrator but you're willing to be friends with benefits.
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Comments (205)
Gerbilkinns 4
to be fair of you're sleeping with him you should'nt need to have that, and as for a boys hand, they need to come , it affects them mentally if they don't as they get pent up. A woman doesn't get pent up so using a vibrator is pointless to be honest
Serisent 26
You obviously don't know anything about women.
showmeyourears 19
She obviously doesn't know anything about either gender. Men don't "need" to come. All that stuff about getting "backed up" is bullshit. Excess sperm die and get absorbed back into the body and released with other forms of waste. Though regular sexual release is quite healthy for the male reproductive system. But that doesn't mean that men have some kind of right to ********** over women. Masturbation is very healthy physically and mentally for everyone. And I will never comprehend why people seem to think that there's something morally wrong with people masturbating while they are in relationships. Unless you're regularly turning down sex to **********, keeping a sexual relationship with yourself as well as with another person is healthy and it makes for a better sex life overall.
amisenho 11
*snicker* Pffff. Sorry, #168, what you just said was so mind-blowingly inaccurate and blatantly one-sided that I couldn't help but giggle a little bit. What, did you read the "Happy Husband Book" or something?
littlepoose 8
#168, Lol. I don't even know what to say about that level of ignorance. You are describing what is known as a 'double standard'. In reality, women can get 'pent up' just as much as men. Please, for the good of everyone, educate yourself
syed121417 22
What s/he meant by saying "need to come" isn't the whole thing about getting backed up. Physically, men need more sexual relief, because it's in their natural urges. It is a fact. Of course, women need to get off, too, but men need it more often. That is why men get written off as "horney" more often
superdom 12
Kind of is its gonna kill your sensation when it comes to sex and will be hard for you 2 cum js
onlychild87 4
Actually it doesn't. That is an 'old wives tale' js
poisongirl708 11
Seriously how do people claim that as cheating
AyPapiChulo 9
lmao he needs to lighten up
Asstarotte 7
OMG he's dumb. Or he's just jealous that it can make you ****** faster than he will ever be able
finity 1
it does count
syed121417 22
That's not cheating at all. I ********** even when my relationships reach that sexual level. But, it must have made him feel insecure, as if he's not enough. A lot of guys feel like that. They think it's one thing to **********, but another thing to have a toy to get you off. Just hide your rabbit in a place only you would find it next time!
DaLiquer 20
Your boyfriend is broken; I suggest you that one back and get a replacement!
Fuzzy_peaches21 12
All I have to say is lol
AksentNetharia 12
Then, by definition, him jacking off is also cheating.