Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
Today, I came home to find my boyfriend playing with himself. He got mad and said I "killed the mood". How? By coming home. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to use a sex toy on him. Am I in the wrong relationship? FML
Today, I suspected something was up when my boyfriend snuck out of bed after he thought I fell asleep. I caught him jerking to porn in the living room and got really upset. He actually got mad, saying, "I have needs and you never put out and get bitchy when I try." FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
I hope you pointed angrily at his hand.
chocolatefrog28 29
Tell him he's actually the other man, and you're already in a meaningful relationship with your vibrator but you're willing to be friends with benefits.
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Comments (205)
Rosebyday 5
what an idiot!
isisorchid 16
1) Get a new, non psycho, boyfriend. 2) Hide your toys better. 3) Find a man that wants to use them WITH you.
jbuckets_404 39
I agree!
Whocarez 10
Yeah? Like masturbating? Break up with that hypocritical idiot.
KoalaBek 23
Insecure much!? My boyfriend bought me a vibrator for valentines day and we've used it together. I knew he was a keeper when he had also purchased a spare battery for it.
OctoberJade 12
My boyfriend uses mine on me. It's not cheating, your guy is just insecure. Either coddle him or get rid of him.
oreoeater 21
Please tell me he was joking
problemsproblems 6
My boyfriend has a mega tantrum if I use toys when he's not there to watch. I feel your pain
Mauskau 36
My ex bought me one because he thought it'd make me change my mind about letting him sit and watch **** in front of me instead of actually having sex with me. But it looks.. kinda scary if you just leave it out, it's only fun when needed. If you had it hidden away then he really needs to not go through your stuff, if it was on the side, how did he not see it before?
TheNinthDoctor 4
Only if its bigger than he is
LegalLoitering 12
If you download the new boyfriend update, it fixes the "stupid" bug!