Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, I was being a little playful with my boyfriend when we began wrestling. He then put me in a choking headlock and wouldn't let me out until I "tapped out". FML
Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
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Top comments
imaweener 0
OP, you should dream about being in a tag rope contest and pull his dick as hard as you can. haha.
mariahrawks 0
I'd like to see an FML where nobody chooses YDI. Honestly, someone explain to me how OP deserved this; it's not like OP punched him first as far as we're concerned.
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Comments (164)
KurouTenshi 0
and I thought I was a violent sleeper. LOL
blini_fml 0
you should be happy that your bf is not a grappler! he could have choked you out cold!
Coccinelle_fml 15
grey's anatomy, season 5
Fedor_is_KING 0
Absolute WIN for #52! Fedor is THE destroyer.
WoAhAnNa123 0
did you punch him back?
cjHidalgo 0
dudjb
tralin 8
Aw man, this sounds like something my girlfriend would post.
s_landholm 0
that sucks a lot I'm sorry
DreamGood 0
just spit in his mouth when he's sleeping. problem solved. (:
Felium 0
its her boyfriend im pretty sure they did more than spit in eachother houses
Batman4890 0
it's cool; this just means he is a secret ninja