Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, I was being a little playful with my boyfriend when we began wrestling. He then put me in a choking headlock and wouldn't let me out until I "tapped out". FML
Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
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Top comments
imaweener 0
OP, you should dream about being in a tag rope contest and pull his dick as hard as you can. haha.
mariahrawks 0
I'd like to see an FML where nobody chooses YDI. Honestly, someone explain to me how OP deserved this; it's not like OP punched him first as far as we're concerned.
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Comments (164)
tonyakage 0
this is an epic win lolz
OooNooo 0
your man a fan of Chris brown, Ike turner, maybe listen to mr hit dat hoe?
denbeste 3
Revenge!
Fedor_is_KING 0
And everyone knows when you go to clinch with someone you grab the back of the neck, not the head.
mexicantumblewee 0
Fedor_is_Queen of drag
xoluvinshayxo 0
lol :))
Zills 0
fedor is overrated
denbeste 3
Revenge!
cookie_monster2 0
45!! op: oh well
facingforeverr 0
its not the cookie monster anymore its the veggie monster..sighh :/ i blame the jews.
squelf 0
haha! this happened to my sister, except he was dreaming he was rocky... doesn't remember a thing. fyl.
FMLFawly 0
Ufc is an organization that hosts MMA fights, not necessarily just a brand. Fedor kills.
kikiface 1
lol that's how i woke up today too, although i don't think my boyfriend meant to do it on purpose
ily1210 10
you sure he was asleep? :P