Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, I was being a little playful with my boyfriend when we began wrestling. He then put me in a choking headlock and wouldn't let me out until I "tapped out". FML
Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
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Top comments
imaweener 0
OP, you should dream about being in a tag rope contest and pull his dick as hard as you can. haha.
mariahrawks 0
I'd like to see an FML where nobody chooses YDI. Honestly, someone explain to me how OP deserved this; it's not like OP punched him first as far as we're concerned.
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Comments (164)
korn247 5
aww man, your boyfriend has problems. fyl.
Cristaderzi 0
Me thinks he just wanted an excuse to hurt you! While yes the men dominate us that does NOT mean/include abuse EVER!! I'd say seek your Pastor or Masjid elders etc advice and help!
Freeze_fml 17
Lifetime movie network is having a special soon, get back to the TV.
judetheobvious 0
YDI for dating a cave-dweller
amo44475 0
fake
Maxbigwood 0
It's MMA fighter, not UFC fighter. also war Fedor
okieraider71 4
Can anyone tell me how come comments are out of order (comment numbers)? thank you
slushpuppy123 0
I can. Normally, If nobody replies to anybody using the "reply" button right next to the name of the poster, than it will go 1, 2, 3, etc. But if 75 replies to 34, it would go 33, 34, 76, 35 etc
dsalex 0
he wanted a Sammich and you wouldn't make Hume one. Fail
kiwicutie_101 0
YDI for sleeping with ur boyfriend!
flashback.miss 28
soooo last week he dreamed of war and tore off your nipple ring........with his teeth.. thinking it was a grenade.... those damn war loving young boys.... lol j/k sorry to hear that.. owies in the facey wacey boo boo boom baby huggie wuggie banana wanna girl :3
wienerdog 0
I see no lyrics coming from you!
flashback.miss 28
IM NOT THE original i reply w lyrics, yo lol besides, i got banned for posting lyrics :/
conrad01 6
ur bf is epic