Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML
Today, I discovered that my 15 year old girl had hidden a disgusting porn film in the "future career" folder. FML
The book of revelations
Today, my mom found a book of dirty stories I'd written in tenth grade. She then told me that I wrote about things she'd never even thought about, and she's been having sex for years. If that wasn't bad enough, she's taken them in to work to show people. FML
Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML
Stuck in the past
Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML
Today, I found my daughter's fanfiction account. I need a new pair of eyes, or brain bleach, or both. FML
Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML
Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML
Caught
Today, I attempted to snoop around my daughter’s room, because I suspect her of having sex with her boyfriend behind my back. Hoping to find the evidence, I went to her room as soon as she left for school. Turns out she rigged her bedroom door. With glitter. Uh oh. FML
Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML
Top comments
limeyemilyy 0
Rewrite some of it to freak her out
zcheema17 0
Lol! Don't go snoop around her stuff! But that is weird...
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Comments (480)
Trembelwick 5
this is what society has come to now... sex stories about fantisy characters now... were all screwed...
zachmofo 0
I bet five dollars my comment is going to be moderated. YOU JACKASS BITCHES!!
Lemycakes 4
Wow ur a dick for snooping..
CIVIVFanatic 3
Ha. I read this and had to make an account just to respond to it. First of all, I personally don't think too highly of Twilight, but that's because I'm a 20 year old guy, not a teenage girl. What gets me is that you said, and I quote, "I can't believe I raised this freak." Are you ok in the head? That's your DAUGHTER you're talking about. Now, if you're a rational human being you'll regret this in a few days and take it down - you're just heated and confused. Still, that's completely unacceptable to call your family member, and what's more your child, a freak. I sincerely hope for you and her that that was just a slip due to your shock.
Maritza345 0
Wow. U should write " UR grounded" or somthin
blahahahaSadFace 0
why should she be grounded?? for expressing her wants and needs in to fan fiction?!? for actually KNOWING. about sex and WANTING to try it out, but instead is writing about?! GIVE A FREAKING SPECTACULAR reason for her to be grounded?!?!?! when HE AS A FATHER OR HESHE MAN THING SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN LOOKING THREW HER STUFF!?! tell me, I honestly want to know :))
xmrsxmansonx 5
at least mine always involved Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer... LOL
kibotoyuki 7
I feel sorry for you. Oh wait, no I don't. You were looking through her stuff WITHOUT her permission. YDI. Have fun living with her.
kibotoyuki 7
I feel sorry for you. Oh wait, no I don't. You were looking through her stuff WITHOUT her permission. YDI. Have fun living with her.
blahahahaSadFace 0
you know it's not that she may be a freak, you may have had nothing to do with it but it's pretty horrid to call your child a freak. specially when I'm sure you your self have had sexual fantasies your self. don't judge someone for who they are. and there was a reason she hid it from you. at least she's just writing about and not actually doing it. If it bothers you so much you have to share it with the world why don't you talk talk to her about it. yeah?? :)
babycakesy 0
how can you call your own daughter a freak? sounds like you're a pretty shitty parent, op.