Today, I talked to exactly 0.0 people on Christmas, 0.0 people on New Year's, and I just checked my phone: The last call I received from anyone other than work or my tenant was October 29th. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked a girl I liked for her number, but she claimed she had a broken phone and was getting a new one for Christmas. Unhinged, I go home and go onto Facebook. First thing I see is her status: "Why is no one answering my calls?" FML
Today, I realized the only "person" I have talked to in the last two days is Siri. FML
Today, I went home, where I live alone, from my dorm room at my university. The only Christmas cards I had received were addressed to the person that lived there before me. FML
Today, feeling festive, I sent everyone on my phone's contact list a holiday message. Almost everyone replied back "who's this?" FML
Today, I went to my uncle's house to celebrate Christmas. His kids don't have their own phones so I let them play with mine. They sent all my contacts messages saying I love them, including two of my ex-girlfriends who both immediately wanted to make up and started to frantically call me. FML
Today, my phone decided to delete all my numbers. I posted on Facebook that people should message or text me if they felt like I should have their number. I didn't get a single reply. FML
Today, I celebrated the new year. Alone. FML
Today. I checked my messages. No one has texted in three days and I have twelve friend contacts but it's Gmail. FML
Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML
Today, happy birthday to me. Any calls from my friends? Nope. Socials? Not even one. My wife and daughter spent any time with me? Couldn’t even be bothered to put their phones down during dinner. Not a single person on God’s green earth gives a shit about me. FML
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Top comments
whatshername?! 39
Well, what about calling people first?
RichardPencil 32
I'm scared that there's a digit to the right of the decimal point. If someone tells you to "talk to the hand," do you get a 0.1 credit for that? I definitely won't be snooping in your freezer!
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Comments (7)
whatshername?! 39
Well, what about calling people first?
RichardPencil 32
I'm scared that there's a digit to the right of the decimal point. If someone tells you to "talk to the hand," do you get a 0.1 credit for that? I definitely won't be snooping in your freezer!
mike3775 39
I’d be happy with that. My phone never stops
TeaTimeAbyss 22
Aaaaw poor little landlord.
AmJBen 5
I’ll talk to you!
AmJBen 5
I’ll talk to you!