Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML
Today, I discovered that my 15 year old girl had hidden a disgusting porn film in the "future career" folder. FML
The book of revelations
Today, my mom found a book of dirty stories I'd written in tenth grade. She then told me that I wrote about things she'd never even thought about, and she's been having sex for years. If that wasn't bad enough, she's taken them in to work to show people. FML
Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML
Stuck in the past
Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML
Today, I found my daughter's fanfiction account. I need a new pair of eyes, or brain bleach, or both. FML
Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML
Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML
Caught
Today, I attempted to snoop around my daughter’s room, because I suspect her of having sex with her boyfriend behind my back. Hoping to find the evidence, I went to her room as soon as she left for school. Turns out she rigged her bedroom door. With glitter. Uh oh. FML
Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML
Top comments
limeyemilyy 0
Rewrite some of it to freak her out
zcheema17 0
Lol! Don't go snoop around her stuff! But that is weird...
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Comments (480)
Sheh_fml 25
Calling your own daughter a freak shows just what a crappy dad you are. Parents should be supportive. Also, like you NEVER did anything similar when you was a kid? And for your information, girls do like sex too, even if guys (and especially dads) deny it and think of their daughters as preschoolers. Oh, yeah, don't look through her stuff. I bet you would be furious if she looked through your secret **** stash.
Sethvir 0
I more think you should be thankful it want pictures of her with two guys pretending to ve those characters...
Wreckless_fml 6
Twilight...
sbell84 5
wow to be that closed minded you must be a prude republican type,she is going to get worse and prob going to grow up to be a *****.she is expressing herself in secret because she is afraid of you.
yorkerca 1
well, he won't be calling her a freak when she's making millions because of this story..
xXSecondSunXx 3
Gosh I feel sorry for you OP :P I'm a 17 yr old girl myself but even I don't read that shit, so imagine the horror on my face when I found out that my 22 yr old male cousin bought the whole Twilight series to start reading :S Can anybody explain to me whats so special about a book that talks about sparkling vampires and half naked guys running around the forest??
blahahahaSadFace 0
it all depends on your preference and if you ever read the books and NOT watch the movies it pretty okay. but it always depends on your preference in reading books. the movie has ruined the books so bad. but hey what ever right.
endlessman 0
ydi for getting into here personal life
Hockaday 0
You're a pos father.
aintholy 0
How dare you do that! Everyone has private thoughts. Just be thankful it's about two boys from a movie/book and not a real life boy she knows.
alyssana 0
you're a freak for invading her privacy. get over it. ydi
blahahahaSadFace 0
no, no it's not. it's way beyond okay! :D OP and half of these commenters are just closed minded jack asses that need to learn that it's no longer okay to be closed minded, that they are part if the reason so many teens go to drugs, and suicide before EVER talking to their parents first. btw I write them to. :)