Today, I was driving with my dog. Looking out the half-open window he stepped on the switch, the window went up, causing his head to get stuck. I looked down and he had scared the shit out of himself, all over my shirt. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while driving with my puppy in the passenger seat, he jumped out of the window. FML
Today, on my way home from work, I went to the car wash. When the spray jets hit the car, my dog jumped out of his crate, into the front seat, and onto a button lowering both back windows. I got both an exterior and interior wash. FML
Today, my dog was riding my car's passenger seat. He clambered over onto my lap, causing me to lose control of the wheel for a few seconds. As I tried to knock him off me, I lost track of my speed, and ended up being pulled over for reckless driving. FML
Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML
Today, I was cleaning my car when I hit the automatic window button while I was vacuuming in between the door and the driver's seat, and got stuck halfway out, in full view of my neighbor. He had to come get me out, because I couldn't reach the button. FML
Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML
Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML
Today, my boyfriend has severe dog phobia, and a dog off its lead ran up to him in a car park. He panicked and tried to jump into the car, but the door hit it in the head and it started fitting and seizing. About three people called the police and the dog's owner broke our car window. FML
Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML
Today, I took my car into a car wash. I guess it was a bad idea to do it with my dog in the car, because he freaked out, started scrambling around, and ended up pissing on everything, me included. FML
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Top comments
AZFreckles 0
I'm sorry for your dog. But what kind of moron are you for driving with a ******* dog on your lap?!?!?! Was there no room on the passenger seat, or better yet, in the back seat?? Can you honestly say that your dog is never a distraction to your driving? I'm guessing NOT if it's ******** on you.
SOCALME 3
Scooby dooby doo?
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Comments (157)
SOCALME 3
Scooby dooby doo?
11colio11 4
My dog is too short for that to happen lol. That sucks for you, and is your dog ok?
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
I get dizzy watching the lines go by on the street. I wonder if dogs do to
mamamiaaa_fml 12
the exact same thing happened with me. except the dog was driving and I had my head out the window.
robc32ca 4
win
Randalltk421 0
You deserve it for driving with a dog on your lap.
FFML_314 12
Crank windows FTW.
4bidden 0
agreed crank windows ftw
6969awesome 0
but if the dog STEPPED on the switch, which would mean pushing it down, then how did it go up?
VinegarStrokes 0
92 you are an idiot.
Dr_Pepper_fml 3
Yes, an idiot indeed. While it's true that some cars' window switches are pushed up to put the window up and pushed down to put the window down, most of the cars I've been in, for one, simply have side-by-side buttons, one that puts the window up and one that puts the window down, both of which you have to PUSH to operate. Stupid people...grr...
Brittneyyyy 7
My dog learned how to actually open the window doing that, intentionally.
gizz104 0
Oh no this opens up a window for horrible 'shitty' puns. Kinda like the window you dog got smashed in. :p
BabesYourAStar 0
What a shit day.
turturkeykey 0
And let the shitty puns begin..
4bidden 0
"what a shit day"?? add that "y" to that;)
BabesYourAStar 0
ha okay shity day;)
schwiggidy 0
holy shit!
maybaybe 0
poor dog
simple885 0
send me some pics
Gondile 4
what
ShesElusive 0
was the dog ok???
Minky1996 0
InO why does everyone care about nothin？
siege10 0
let the whole gamut of shit puns commence because that won't get old.
unidentified_sta 5
Of course it won't. Everyone here totally has something unique to add and is in no manner repetitiously dragging out old jokes.
btnhdude 0
I like your sarcasm.
btnhdude 0
I like your sarcasm like it like I like to watch Family Guy. Do you like to watch that show?
FYLDeep 26
I guess you need one of those window lock buttons. But keep the windows up anyway. It's getting below zero now. Way too ******* cold for that.
agm2010 0
i agree and he is from Wisconsin