Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home, he was masturbating. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML
Today, I came home early from work and caught my boyfriend jerking off. When I tried to flirt and say I could help him, he said he wasn't in the mood anymore. He hasn't touched me in months. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML
Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend masturbating, again. Meanwhile we haven’t had sex in weeks. FML
Today, like every other day for the past two weeks, my husband was not in the mood for sex. He told me this while masturbating. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, my boyfriend would rather jerk off than have sex with me. Even if I'm next to him in bed. FML
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Top comments
tateh22 1
Ouch, I would throw his food away and tell him to buy his own shit from now on!
BeatlesObsessed 12
You should've taken over and saved him some work. ;)
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Comments (132)
Amanjot13 0
maybe its a hint that u suck at sex....or u dont suck....get it hehe
Kyzahhh 7
Why would anyone visit miss Palmer when your partner is willing to give you some loving.. It's beyond me
CadillacPimpen 6
It must really suck, it's gross or they just wanted a fast one...
DjeePee 25
Because a visit to miss Palmer takes less effort and time. You only have to satisfy yourself, and a guy can do that very quickly. Although I can slightly understand the boyfriend, I feel very sorry for OP. Masturbation is a simple solution for a guy to fulfil his sexual needs. Girls find sex a more emotional issue and, since OP is probably very angry right now, she won't be in the mood for masturbation herself. And she probably will blame herself and her body for her boyfriend not wanting to have sex. FYL.
Kyzahhh 7
If physical appearance is the reason why people avoid being intimate with their partners I don't see the point of having a relationship with that person, not saying sex is the only part of a relationship that matters but to a certain extent it is a vital part, i just think that it would lead to alot of arguments if one or both people were sexually frustrated.
mynewaccount 8
haha. I bet you suck, or maybe you don't...
DarkHelmet 10
Haha I see what u did there
TheChad85 1
Lol probably very true!
jpmc808 1
Step your game up!
TheNewGuy03 29
Sit back and admire his handiwork! Or don't. Do what you want...or whatever. This is why I don't write for advice columns.
koekj 6
NEVER believe it when a man says he doesn't want sex.
DarkHelmet 10
Educate yourself with pornos and then make him pay for his shunning of your offer with the best sex of his life and right before he climaxes STOP get of him and start masturbating
baconstripslover 8
I'll have sex with you 3 times day! ;D
perdix 31
It's not me -- it's you. If only your pussy had an opposable thumb, you'd be able to get some from that Master Baiter! PS: He's cheating on you, or he's not heterosexual.
GrammarNazzzzzi 6
Or OP is bad at sex and he gets more pleasure from his hands...btw girls turn down sex and its ok but when a man does it, the world becomes a crazy place.
perdix 31
Yes, it's a double standard, but you'd have to be some kind of utopian dreamer to ignore it. If a woman refuses sex to her man, he needs to be a good sport about it, but if he refuses her, the gates of hell are opened to him. Since men don't have periods and can't possibly become pregnant, there is really no downside for us to have sex, so the double standard isn't purely arbitrary.
Virginia6810 16
That and our hormones are different. It's harder to get in the mood for women than it is for men. In our 6+ years of marriage my husband has turned me down once. I couldn't believe it. But every other single time I have initiated it he was running for the bedroom.
ScarletBloom 14
His right hand is better than you.
NPN_Scorpio 16
aww, how sweet. While you were gone he started missing you.
jellitonoctopus 19
No it's not.