Today, my sister and I bought new cell phones. We both wanted the same phone in red, but the guy told us that there was only one red phone left. Flirting with him, I said "You should give the prettier sister the red phone." My new phone is black. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, me and the guy I was dating ran into my sister at the mall. He took one look at her and mumbled, "Great, I chose the ugly one" under his breath. FML
Today, I went and bought my wife a new cell phone for a Christmas present. She called me five minutes later saying she got a notification e-mail thanking her for her purchase. FML
Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML
Today, I saw a ridiculously hot guy dining with his family. I decided not to flirt with him with his parents around but to ask his sister (who went to the restroom) to give him my phone number. When I came back, I saw her pointing a finger at me, and the whole family turning around and staring. FML
Today, my bitch of a sister broke my new phone, which took me months of work to earn. Her excuse? If I didn't want her to break it, I shouldn't have let her use it. FML
Today, I went to visit my Grandmother, accidentally leaving my phone home during the weekend. When I got back I had 2 texts from my crush. One saying "I want to take the most beautiful girl to prom, go with me?" and the other saying, "Fine fattie, I'll ask someone else." FML
Today, I got a new smartphone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML
Today, I texted the hottest girl in the school saying, "I really like you, we should date". She responded with a text saying, "Sorry, I'm not into you." I then got a text saying, "Sorry, my brother stole my phone, and answered, but still it's no". I got rejected twice. Once by a man. FML
Today, I was meeting my sister's fiancé. I went to an internet cafe before I went to her house for dinner with them. I was on a computer and there was this really attractive man next to me. I was flirting with him and we exchanged numbers. Turns out, he is my sister's fiancé. FML
Today, in our family group chat, my sister-in-law asked me what I got my new girlfriend for Valentine’s Day. Not long after, my brother called me pissed off about me making him look bad. FML
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Top comments
lettertjes 0
That's what you get when you fish for compliments.
xxmollyxx 25
I would've given her the red phone even if I thought you were prettier, just because you were being so full of yourself! Girls like that piss me off.
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Comments (120)
lettertjes 0
That's what you get when you fish for compliments.
dotsdesu 0
what's wrong with being uglier than your sister?
raNDMGUy 5
yeah he probably did it because you said that
Chocolate_Chunk 2
102, boo-*******-hoo
littlemissxx 0
nobody cares
Spyrunner 0
The salesman may have thought you were referring to your sister.
Cupffin 0
She probably was.
lyndis_fml 0
Full of yourself much?
Flutist 3
It might fix her lop jaw.
muffinsareyummy 1
ha. what a way to pop an ego, huh?
xxmollyxx 25
I would've given her the red phone even if I thought you were prettier, just because you were being so full of yourself! Girls like that piss me off.
The_Great_Zucchi 15
Yep, what ^^^^ said...
Emrysa 1
This. You're insulting your sister, wow you sound like a winner. I'd give the phone to your sister because living with you and your superiority complex/entitlement is probably punishment enough, she deserves the reward.
The__Redneck 7
I was about to post the same thing myself. You and your sister hash out who you think is prettier. Leave the rest of us out of it.
stillxsearching 3
^^this^^
JohnForge 13
Exactly what I'm thinking. I would've said, "How about you just look for a different color? It's the same exact phone." Of course I wouldn't have sounded pissy. Or I'd be fired.
Ragna_fml 0
Or you just wait a week and get the colour you actually want.
angrygood 0
I know, right? Why so impatient? And I can't believe that you'd even do that to your sister. Would you really want to hurt someone's feelings over a phone's color? Spoiled... so spoiled...
Twinklestar 0
That's not really flirting. That's just being full of yourself and I think regardless of your looks most people would've done the same.
Shadow_Phantom 26
YDI for thinking black is a bad color. And trying to "flirt."
CYNNER 0
You're on everyones type and neither is your sister
lamblover486 0
the doctor says, that is a winning salesman, looks like u ugly