Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home, he was masturbating. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML
Today, I came home early from work and caught my boyfriend jerking off. When I tried to flirt and say I could help him, he said he wasn't in the mood anymore. He hasn't touched me in months. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML
Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend masturbating, again. Meanwhile we haven’t had sex in weeks. FML
Today, like every other day for the past two weeks, my husband was not in the mood for sex. He told me this while masturbating. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, my boyfriend would rather jerk off than have sex with me. Even if I'm next to him in bed. FML
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Top comments
tateh22 1
Ouch, I would throw his food away and tell him to buy his own shit from now on!
BeatlesObsessed 12
You should've taken over and saved him some work. ;)
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Comments (132)
castrosabeast 7
Blue waffle?
ikickgingers 15
33 - legit threw up a little thinking about that
NPN_Scorpio 16
Three strikes, then he whipped it out?
fatalwish 6
When he said he wasnt in the mood he really meant he wasnt in the mood for you
TwitchingNebula 17
Maybe he was just cleaning the pipes for when he got back. You know. To get the short nut out of the way.
doogy15 11
I got to hand it to you. You guys have a real grip on the relationship. Lol =]
TheCylonmaster 3
You might want to take notes. You could learn a lot from his hand.
Jujubilee 1
He's just not that into you.
perdix 31
It was for medical reasons.
bigdaddi69 0
I have 1 word for you, GAY!!!! Any man that says he's not in the mood 3 times in the same day, well his head ain't right, lmao. If my girl had done that well we would have had sex 3 times........lol.
patrickalamo 48
Like laundry, it was a small load so he was doing it by hand. Or it's not it is you...