Today, I realized I can hold a pencil in my fat rolls. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML
Today, I realized how weak I truly am when I tore a muscle in my hand trying to discreetly fix a wedgie. FML
Today, after much dieting and exercise, I can proudly say that my love handles are now bigger than my ass. FML
Silver linings
Today, I found out the one good thing about having fat rolls: when someone walks in on you sitting on the toilet, they hide your private parts. FML
Today, I was so ashamed of my weight when I sat down and the suction of my thighs made a loud fart noise, I admitted to it being a fart rather than my fat rolls. FML
Today, I got scared by my own leg fat. FML
Autobodyshaming
Today, I'm officially fat enough I have to lift my belly out of the way to get to my zipper when I need to pee in public toilets. I hate myself. FML
Today, after having my bath, I realised that I've gotten so fat that I have to lift up my butt cheeks in order to dry underneath them. FML
Today, stepping on a scale for the first time in years, I had to lift up my stomach to see the number. FML
It creeps up on you
Today, I looked down while taking a piss and could only see my belly button. Wow, I’m fat now. FML
Top comments
TheBigDawg 8
Awesome, me too. :D
sbarre1 0
Thin people can do this. Depends on how you sit. There is no FML here. Now, if it was an orange or something, then you'd get a real FML.
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Comments (216)
NuclearWinter 0
YDI, fatty.
blakehilli8 0
Second
RavensRule97 0
my friend can put a water bottle in his fat rolls
reverseesrever 0
Today a chick held me in her fat rolls, I'm a pencil. FML
JarJarBinks_fml 0
It's a guy. You fail
Tedet 0
At least he can always have a pencil handy.
Tamuz 0
epic win
tbbays04 0
hahahhaha for some reason, #24 just made my day.
gotplayed93 0
wow i feel so bad for this pencil. although I must say it would really stink to be that fat
n_london 0
hahaha. yes! that is the real FML here.
superstephen4 5
MLIA
fmlfmlfml15 0
Whats funny is i actually feel bad for the pencil, not the OP (#24 wins). I'm sick of these FMLs about the OPs complaining about their weight!! You could substitute this one with "Today, I'm still fat. FML" Do something about it!!! Go on a ******* diet!!! Sitting here and writing an FML about isn't gonna make you lose weight!!!
chippa 24
Just because he has rolls doesn't mean he's fat. That sounds a little weird... But let me explain. I'm coming close to being overweight now, but not quite, I'm still in the "average" section. I have rolls. Of course, if I sit or stand up straight or if I lie down, of course I don't have rolls, but if I slouch, I have like three big ones. I have always had rolls like this for as long as I can remember. But I look back at a picture from two years ago and I was REALLY flipping skinny. I had rolls the size of Jupiter when I bent over, even back then. I'm not quite sure how it works, but it does. : And I could, without a doubt, hold pencils in them...
kellandj2019 7
#162, your point is exactly right, I would just like to add that the reason it happens is because the skin is stretched over your belly, but when you bend over, you are giving it some slack which forms rolls.
TheBigDawg 8
Awesome, me too. :D
SoonerInTX 0
I've been doing this for years, nothing special.
kathie_bunny 14
Why you gotta pop his bubble like that?
Anonanimal 0
holy shit lose weight
KRYPTON1T3 5
yeah, ydi for being fat.
BigManny94 0
Holy shit get pretty,,,
xleanne_aLly 23
Holy shit. I can do that too and I weigh 116.
screwtaylor 0
Mmmm.. Yummy. I bet I can get lost in your rolls.
plexico 4
screwtaylor, you are the first thing that I thought of when I read this! He can either lose weight or find a girl like you that like their men fat, that is, a Chubby Chaser or a Plumper Humper. I think he should exploit his talent. I'm always losing pencils -- I'd love to be able to store extras in my abdominal blubber for when I need one. Maybe he can store spare change there, too, so he can have money for the candy machine. This will satisfy his hunger and help him maintain his Human Couch physique. I can't help it, screwtaylor, but I imagine you exploring your boyfriend for hidden treasure, giddy over each discovery of a pencil or small change, and accidentally finding a penis.
screwtaylor 0
Thanks for telling me your life story, Plexico. Now I know the true reason why your wife is divorcing you.
arienh4 0
When trolls collide.
junaho 0
winrar
greeneagle 0
Ouch!
plexico 4
Aw, screwtaylor, if only it were that easy! Don't be like that, honey, divorce isn't in the near future and talks about polygamy are going slower than I hoped. The plan is to first warm wife #1 up to the idea of polygamy in theory before I move on to bringing up specific candidates. I have no doubt that when I show her your pictures and some of your funnier comments, she will say, "That's the kind of girl I want to share my Sexy Plexy with!" Stay Sweet!
turnedoffTVgrey 0
Hey I'll get in on that. I cook and clean and give a decent BJ. I think my resume speaks for itself.
Intoxicunt 6
#159, lmfao. Wow, Plexico is popular with the ladies.
nicole1784 0
chubby chaser!!!!!
LewJH 0
WHY WOULD YOU TRY THAT? :|
Flypig777 0
Oh dear. that's what I thought.
IFUCKINLOVETEA 0
maybe you should stop eating for a while?
_Meghan_ 5
no one should "stop" eating. you need a healthy diet.
Rickilynn1 10
dieting is actually worse.
adelaide_evening 0
While bending over or just standing regularly? Did you know that that's also the test preteen and teen girls do to see if they need to wear a bra? Except, usually they should be wearing a bra anyway. Maybe you should too?
jnic 0
Nope, the pencil test is to see if you need an underwire bra for extra support, not just any bra.
sulitak 27
OP is a guy though
ClumsyJason 3
LOL, YDI
Lucky_strike_fml 0
haha :)
spacer_ 0
I thought for a minute there your name was tomchub. Made me laugh, my bad.