Today, I overheard my fourteen year old daughter talking on the phone. Apparently, as of last night, she and her best friend have their "official licenses in muff diving". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 14-year-old daughter told me she's pregnant and plans on dropping out of school to live a life on the road with her boyfriend. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML
Today, I learned that when my daughter spent the night at her best friend's house for her 18th birthday, they made her an account on one of those "cam girl" websites, and now every time she goes over there, she masturbates for money in front of strangers. FML
Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML
Today, I overheard my 14-year-old daughter telling her friend that she's saving money to get her hymen surgically removed so her first time won't hurt. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my daughter's 14-year-old boyfriend confessed, in front of her, that he only went out with her so he might have a chance to date me. My daughter isn't speaking to me. FML
Today, I was alarmed to hear my daughter's boyfriend talk about dropping the kids off at the pool. She has no children. Turns out he was referring to himself taking a dump. FML
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Top comments
mejiiaa 0
Lezbehonest you raised her well
alexicanaaa 7
Going down on a girl, I'm assuming.
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Comments (472)
funnynesh 10
Holy shitt
ididntdoit1980 8
At least she is experimenting now before she goes to college and does it drunk. And the term muff diving meaning going down on girls has been around longer than the term for the shot.
ac_howe 0
you must be so proud :')
chippy613 0
thats a lovely daughter you have there
yellananner 1
Dude that's so hot
xxCandyKissxx 1
Why do guys find it soo hot?!
j_cat187 20
Because we are guys
Michael_92 20
I might be the only guy here that doesn't but I don't find it that hot. Specially if i'm interested in said girl.
simonababiiex3 0
It's eating out a girl !
ospeth 4
Better then getting pregnant.
ospeth 4
If you don't know what muff diving is then google ***********.
furfantasies 0
I'm too lazy to google muff diving.
mcaps97 0
maybe they "got their licenses" cuz some guys did it to them? theyre young. you never know what they could mean. just a thought. dont hate on me for this please!