Today, I overheard my fourteen year old daughter talking on the phone. Apparently, as of last night, she and her best friend have their "official licenses in muff diving". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 14-year-old daughter told me she's pregnant and plans on dropping out of school to live a life on the road with her boyfriend. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML
Today, I learned that when my daughter spent the night at her best friend's house for her 18th birthday, they made her an account on one of those "cam girl" websites, and now every time she goes over there, she masturbates for money in front of strangers. FML
Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML
Today, I overheard my 14-year-old daughter telling her friend that she's saving money to get her hymen surgically removed so her first time won't hurt. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my daughter's 14-year-old boyfriend confessed, in front of her, that he only went out with her so he might have a chance to date me. My daughter isn't speaking to me. FML
Today, I was alarmed to hear my daughter's boyfriend talk about dropping the kids off at the pool. She has no children. Turns out he was referring to himself taking a dump. FML
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Top comments
mejiiaa 0
Lezbehonest you raised her well
alexicanaaa 7
Going down on a girl, I'm assuming.
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Comments (472)
IsaiahG69 0
Thats hott ;)
penlandcourtney 0
Whats so wrong with that?
l0v3p4in 7
She muffed her muffin.
hateevryone 15
muff diving?
isis_morrigan 18
Official license...must be something new, they never required that when I was growing up. Am I grandfathered in or do I have to go apply now? Hmmm...
toowie_fml 20
When in doubt..urban dictionary is your best friend
Rocky007 15
NTTAWWT. Well, except that they are 14.
MrsUresti 8
Eeww gross
fuzz97 23
Don't even talk, you've probably had your muff dived into at one point or another.
MrsUresti 8
I can say whatever I want if u don't like my comment then simply ignore it and move on to the next instead of moving your dam mouth!!!!! >:O
chellyX92 8
He moved his fingers on the keyboard not his mouth also if you can say what ever you they can say what ever they want to who ever they want. That liberty isn't one sided beeteedubs.
lindsaylove193 1
Muff diving??
gustavo1271 2
Thats a point of time any parent fears. At least it's a girl and not a guy at that age. But given what she's doing it'll be soon when she starts on a guy if she hasn't yet.
LulusLemon 8
not necessarily