Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was laying with my face dangling down the side of my bed, when my kitten rushed up to me looking worried. He sniffed me for a while, then decided the best thing to do was to stand on his hind legs and start punching my face like a speed bag. FML
Today, I got a kitten. She decided to sleep on my bed, waking me up periodically during the night by biting my face to make sure I was still alive. FML
Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML
Today, my cat head-butted me awake as usual. I reached to pet him, but it wasn't his face I touched. It was the still-twitching corpse of the disemboweled rat he held in his jaws. FML
Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML
Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML
Today, my cat was incessantly meowing trying to get me to wake up and feed him. Because it was 6 a.m., and I'd hardly slept at all last night, my brain decided that the best solution to get him to shut up would be to hug him. The result was a normally docile and lazy cat giving me a nasty scratch next to my left eye. FML
Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML
Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML
Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML
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Top comments
Mirorbo 27
What exactly made you think that was a good idea?
brokenclockwork 0
he's only a kitten. it couldn't of hurt that much anyway. so stop being a pussy, pun intended.
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Comments (98)
BlueTwist89 0
D: That sucks. But if I was that cat, I'd be glad you woke me up from that scary dream.
Peacemaker9 7
lol FAIL!!!!
Rob207 3
should just drown it
RedPillSucks 33
Lesson for the day: Never **** (with) an angry pussy.
sourgirl101 29
The one time pussy in your face is bad. Better luck next time OP.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Not a fan of angry sex, are we? *tsk tsk* Mrs. RPS is missing out! ;)
sourgirl101 29
I know, right Jane? Sometimes I start a fight just for the angry sex. jk
artisticninja713 13
You know it's sweet you tried to save him from a nightmare but really get a stick or something next time. YDI
phorcep 0
The same thing happened to me with my ferret, and waking him elicited the same reaction. Luckily, ferrets are far less coordinated than cats when they're tired, and he just ended up perching on my shoulder rather than eating my face.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Aww. I was wrong, then. My boys are just too domesticated, I guess. When they twitch and dook in their sleep, I couldn't wake them with an earthquake and a fire alarm. The hilarious ferret coma stage.
El_Mero_Mero 0
mmm I got two cats they do the same thing every time they sleep. maybe it's not a good idea I don't mess with em when they sleeping. :0
liiipzs0swe3t 0
number 37 haha yeah I can picking up while sleeping and she looks dead she won't move I thought she was dead first time I try waking her up lol bit yeah it was a mistake everyone stop being assholes he was worried what the **** is wrong with all of you
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Yeah, exactly! Look up "ferret coma" on YouTube. It's pretty funny, after that first initial scare they put us through. On the plus side, you can take advantage of that and train them to cuddle as adults.
lickmyjock 0
please tell mr you are a librarian...
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Who, 56? I can't tell if you're calling me an old maid, for my (admitted) Crazy Ferret Lady status, or if you're complimenting 49's pic. O.o
KylieBunny 0
How would you like to be waken up while your sleeping!?
Senseless_487 29
I'll attack someone's face if they wake me up!
hairdreser0nfire 0
lol I would too! this FML me laugh.
ChildrenOfFilth 12
your pussy's gone crazy!