Today, my fiancé had a nightmare and sat bolt upright in bed, claimed he had a nightmare where we were married, then his head hit the pillow and he was asleep again. That was his nightmare. Us being married. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the night, crying. When I asked her why, she said that she had a dream where we were getting married. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away, and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML
Today, my wife slept in my bed (she normally sleeps in another room because of my nightmares from PTSD). I fell asleep in 30 minutes and had a nightmare, in which I woke up to me kneeing her tailbone from an in-dream assault I fought back from. I hadn’t had these in a while, and now she’s injured. FML
Today, I woke up following one of the worst nightmares of my life. I was sweating, clutching the sheets, and feeling sick to the stomach. I'd been dreaming of my wedding that's taking place next week. FML
Today, my husband jolted in bed and while still half-asleep said, "I had a nightmare; I dreamt we had a kid." I'm 8 months pregnant. FML
Today, I lay in bed reflecting on my fiancé's complaint about my lack of displays of affection. I felt terrible, so I rolled over and hugged him in his sleep. He's a fully trained martial artist and his immediate reaction was to try to snap my neck. FML
Today, I dreamt my fiancé was rolling frozen potatoes onto my bed to wake me up. In reality I woke up screaming to intense cramps in my legs which almost reduced me to tears. I could barely walk for two hours. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé if we could get legally married at the courthouse before we had the big wedding ceremony, just to quell my irrational fear of being left at the altar. He agreed, then didn’t show up at the courthouse. Nightmare realized. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
I take it he's endlessly stalling. You know the old saying, "Why give the cow the right to half your stuff and restrict you from seeing your calves every other weekend, when you get the milk for free?"
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Comments (1)
RichardPencil 32
I take it he's endlessly stalling. You know the old saying, "Why give the cow the right to half your stuff and restrict you from seeing your calves every other weekend, when you get the milk for free?"