Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML
Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her dad showed me his gun collection, and said the first rule of gun safety is never to point a gun at something you don't intend to kill. All while waving a handgun in my direction and glaring at me with barely suppressed rage. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML
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Top comments
cynide 13
Run.
joe502 3
Holy crap, I have to get me one of those!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought cleaning my riot shotguns would be good enough... But the shirt with the guns will defiantly keep little pricks out of here....
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Comments (162)
Relenaz 9
I feel bad for that daughter. That must have been embarrassing for her, lol.
jatinbhanot 6
and I thought this only happened in the movies... :P
papasik 6
Do not worry. Our organization laws require us to pass a mandatory 'Shooting at the testicles' class before we are allowed to put on such a shirt. Statistically, collateral damage to dicks only happens 60% or so of the time, so you have a good chance to have something left.
MooseKnuckle5150 13
I have the same shirt. And my daughter's nowhere close to dating age. Can't wait to intimidate potential boyfriends.
asmb100 27
If/when I have a daughter, when her date walks in, I'll be sitting at the table will all of the guns I have cleaning them one by one, and when they leave, I'll toss him a round and say "It travels a lot faster after nine o'clock."
Dcm210 19
Its just a shirt. Maybe ask him if he'd rather his daughter become a lesbian?
Jordath_Fil 11
You sir are obviously not from the south...
Sinkhole 26
62 - Apparently, this is new to you, but: lesbians date too.
EvilUndead 9
76, Well, if he's a real man, she's less likely to shoot/hurt a girl. So that's an option.
Sinkhole 26
A real man wouldn't just shoot/hurt people for dating his daughter, so what's your point?
EvilUndead 9
97, Somehow I disagree. A real man should be able to hurt *wrong* men if they date his daughter.
asmb100 27
So, I see you're a sinkhole. How's the sinkhole life?
jem970 19
I'd say it started out really well don't you? :-)
BroadwayGirl16 6
Sounds like me dad...
283leis 8
I don't know if I should consider myself lucky that I don't have a dad. (I'm a girl)
raesos91 26
ooh, I hope they have one of these for mommies too; m.a.d.d.
ciara1994 5
My dad has that t-shirt , it even scares my guy friends still :)