Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML
Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her dad showed me his gun collection, and said the first rule of gun safety is never to point a gun at something you don't intend to kill. All while waving a handgun in my direction and glaring at me with barely suppressed rage. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML
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Top comments
cynide 13
Run.
joe502 3
Holy crap, I have to get me one of those!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought cleaning my riot shotguns would be good enough... But the shirt with the guns will defiantly keep little pricks out of here....
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Comments (162)
OhhhMaryy 12
Lmao my dads the same way!! He cool though, they just get a little jealous. so treat her right. (;
buddy51 23
Or die in a pool of your own blood!
OhhhMaryy 12
haha yeah, dads can be very jealous w their daughters, shit my dad is, and a lot
klutz44 28
I'm not really sure that "jealous" is the right word...
CaptTeemo 10
He could be jealous if his wife left him.
ThriceWritten 21
I think she meant protective, not jealous.
ThriceWritten 21
Either your girlfriend's dad has a good sense of humor, or this is your cue to be very, very polite around him ...
emag_eht 18
Or he can just be a great boyfriend all the time and show the respect he should show the father. If OP truly isn't a bad person then there shouldn't be any problems.
DjeePee 25
Yeah, because respect should only come from the OP.
EvilUndead 9
23, "bad" is subjective and is a matter of preference. Keep that in mind...
Eluveitie 9
Go away, 41.
EvilUndead 9
60, I go where I please. And I please where I go.
BabeWithThePower 5
It's just a daddy thing, OP. He's against you taking his little princess away from him. My dad would wear the same kind of thing.
maz95 17
Stay on his good side before it's too late.
SuperDanielNL 23
Hope it's a joke. Perhaps you'll even get along later. If it's not, run till your legs give in.
sarcastik_fml 2
I need one of those.
BubbleGrunge 18
Apparently the shirt has done its job; scared ya enough that you'll take REAL good care of his daughter!
DocBastard 40
Ah yes, the number 1 fear of fathers with daughters everywhere. Must. Get. That. Shirt.
ulissey_fml 22
He made sure you knew what not to "Pop"...
smartman136 8
Am i the only one who would take mild offense to this? Its an open threat to kill on sight, a young man who has an interest in his daughter because she has a mutual feeling towards him. I have never laid hands on a woman or treated them badly. I believe a better approach would be just to talk to the boy instead of openly saying " imma kill you". Get to know the boy and accept him. If he seems like he would be a bad influence for her, pressure him for details and if he says something out of line just say "i hope you're joking, i cant bring myself to agree with (insert problem here)". Communication, not violence is the key to a relationship and if you aren't willing to talk to your children and their dates, they are more inclined to go behind your back. Then you get to be a grandpa at 40.
EvilUndead 9
Violence is a form of communication. You can learn a bit about other people if you get into fight with them.
thatoneguy79 10
Undoubtedly, you are not the only one that takes offense to this shirt. You are, however, one of the few people that does not have appear to the ability to appreciate and differentiate humor from literal. For example, right now I am wearing a "Coed Naked Firefighting" shirt, yet I have never been firefighting in the nude. It's a joke; calm down and chive on. Wait; I did not mean for you to eat chives...
doodlecloud 27
Don't worry 26, I think it's out of order too. If it was just a joke then it'd be okay but if the dad is actually one of those kind of dads, which I'll assume he is because otherwise there wouldn't be an fml, it's too far, not to mention a bit creepy.
ao9s7yashdun 7
I 2nd your comment 26.
slingo234 12
Yes u r the only one hence all the thumbs downs u got. And u must not have a daughter because then u know it doesn't matter if they act nice in front of u its what ur not there for....