Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad at a tennis game. I could tell he despised me from the start, but it only got worse when I played him. He smashed the ball at me and I went to hit it, but I missed and fell over, tearing my arm up on the gravel. He had a smirk on his face for the rest of the day. FML
Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. I recognized him. He's the guy that broke into my car and stole my backpack two weeks ago. FML
Today, I was sneaking over to my girlfriend's house. I sent her mother a text message thinking it was my girlfriend saying "There's a stalker coming in to make you his play mate ;]" Unfortunately when I got to her window I was greeted by her dad with a bat. FML
Today, I was with my girlfriend in her room. She starts screaming. Her father bursts in and, thinking I'm some kind of rapist, hits me in the head with a baseball bat. Not bad enough? I wasn't the one making her scream. There was a huge spider on the wall. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Today, I confessed to my girlfriend that I cheated on her. She told me that she needed time to think, and left. An hour later, her dad came by with a baseball bat. FML
Today, at age 27, I went to pick up the girl I like for my first ever date. Her brother answered the door with a baseball bat, said the date was off and threatened to smash my kneecaps to pieces if I ever came back. FML
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Top comments
OkayFam 4
Jesus what did you do
GhostFox 34
What the ****, that is not okay. Unless you were doing something that was actively hurting someone that's attempted assault, and illegal. There's a line between "protective father" and "over controlling asshole looking for excuses to hurt people" and this guy is very far into the latter side. I'd be asking myself if this girl is really worth fending off multiple attempts at beatings and possibly getting killed, especially if she didn't care enough to try to make him stop.
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Comments (10)
OkayFam 4
Jesus what did you do
ThrottleJockey 36
Died for your sins, duh!
GhostFox 34
What the ****, that is not okay. Unless you were doing something that was actively hurting someone that's attempted assault, and illegal. There's a line between "protective father" and "over controlling asshole looking for excuses to hurt people" and this guy is very far into the latter side. I'd be asking myself if this girl is really worth fending off multiple attempts at beatings and possibly getting killed, especially if she didn't care enough to try to make him stop.
RichardPencil 32
Gotta know more! Were you trying to pull off the MILF-daughter threesome or is he just a psycho? So many questions!!!
siggy_mcsigx 22
Ugh. I'm super thankful my father was never like this.
adjwejaelwkdc 21
Whether this is an FML or a YDI depends on whether (a) you provoked him deliberately, (b) you provoked him without meaning to, (c) he's just a psychopath, or (d) it was both your fault and his.
stickyface 17
It's traditional for some families.
Titan_Slayer 21
Is her dad named Negan?
the_catherine 9
Jesus Christ, what happened? Wtf?! 😱