ItHurtsLIkeHell
Malaysia
Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Roselyn Cazares
Today, I was petting my female hamster when I felt a big mass under her. I immediately thought it was a tumor so I poked it to see if it hurt her. It didn't. Turns out my female hamster is actually a male, and he has really big balls. I touched my hamster's balls. FML
whymommywhy
United States
Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
zac545
United States
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
roze198765
United States
Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML
EpicFail
United States
Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML
Anonymous
Poor little guy
Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML
Anonymous
United States
So…
Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML
deadhamster
United States
Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML
HttpsHaileyy
United States
Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML
Top comments
RedTriceratops 0
But I don't have testicles.
cabbitt 0
I hope you learned to look where you sit.
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Comments (297)
Jackiess22 0
Poor hamster.
blastvortex 4
Gee, you mean that something that perceived your actions as threatening and fought back? Who would've thought that could ever happen.... Or maybe it was trying to find its nuts and got yours instead. [Hamster] "Oh, here they are! Yum!" *crunch*
masterblaster39 0
#58 with or without the hamster?
lovin_darkness 0
FAIL
comatoast 0
Rhino the hamster doesn't **** around
cardiojunkie 0
YDI 4 sitting on a hamster
BooHaUrScared 0
You're sick
kritz0 10
http://www.askoxford.com/asktheexperts/faq/aboutspelling/learnt "What is the difference between 'learnt' and 'learned'? These are alternative forms of the past tense and past participle of the verb learn. Learnt is more common in British English, and learned in American English. There are a number of verbs of this type (burn, dream, kneel, lean, leap, spell, spill, spoil etc.). They are all irregular verbs, and this is a part of their irregularity." I am ashamed to call myself American at times because of some of the idiots who think they know something and speak up. Showing how STUPID and IGNORANT they really are. (I'm definitely proud I'm a dual citizen and can always revert back to saying I'm Canadian also.)
asteroth 8
Yikes. if i had known Americans were this sensitive about grammar I would have kept my mouth shut. :X
idkweird 0
Most of us aren't. It's just sad when you see the ignorance of some, and the rest of us get stereotyped in. My ex was English and we used to tease each other about the right way to say things, but it was all in fun, and I know enough of my history to know where my language developed, lol.
asteroth 8
I was only taught English in Hochschule, but we really didn't get much into debates between other forms of English. It's a little confusing. My foray into the argument was like a stab in the dark. >_>
asteroth 8
Whoops! I meant Grundschule. :)
harvardgirl 0
bravo genius ;p
blitzen123 0
That poor hamster. : (