Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML
Today, my boyfriend told my hamster he loved her. Repeatedly. In 'cute' baby voices. He has yet to say it to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend saying, "I shall be the prince, and you shall be the princess," to his hamster. Once he saw me, he quickly turned to the hamster and said, "I have to go. The dragon is here." FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
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Top comments
laurabev 9
Why would you suck on his fingers??
peete182 0
Dont suck things that have been holding hamsters
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Comments (209)
laurabev 9
Why would you suck on his fingers??
sakforduc 0
Uhhh why not?
fredrikleijon 4
Why not?
MinkaGraham 0
erm.. you knew he had been holding a hamster but you stuck his fingers in your mouth anyways.? with or without pee on his hand, it's still gross either way..
YourEvilHero 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
there are so many funny fmls as of late
farahmia 0
She was not trying to be cute she was trying to turn him on.
EvilPotato 15
1 possibly to get him in the mood.
Feklfekl2222 32
More importantly is playing with his hamster a euphemism
moonmonkeyman 6
I choose u catachu
Feklfekl2222 32
I like catachu, I may start calling pikacat catachu from now on
nava1210 12
Well, how does it taste?
My_Nightmare 19
Like hamster piss. . .durr
natashax21 5
How bad does hamster pee taste?
Toxic_Ninja 2
Is that your real cat? it's awesome!
Feklfekl2222 32
Toxic ninja, yes I have dyed my cat to look like pikachu because I am insane and mildly cruel to cats.
zombicidal 11
isn't pikachu mouse pokemon
moonmonkeyman 6
101 yeah your point
herpitydurteedur 0
What'd you use? Manic panic? I used infra-red to put the assassins creed logo on the back of my kitten so if anything happens it's easier to pick him out. Oh and his name is Ezio(ezzy) so that helps too XD.
FrostHeart 36
65- I like to bully buddy on my free time.
moonmonkeyman 6
139 did u mean 62 I don't have a cat
sickjairo 7
Because she is a freaky girl.
purpyolo 0
p
MrKlutch 1
Kinky
poy2x 0
She was trying to be cute.. Didn't u read the FML?
moonmonkeyman 6
Nvm I 139 I understand now
TheDevilWearsJoe 8
Fetishes.
kareltje 17
That sucks, I guess :D
ceilingfans 1
I see what you did there.
False_Stupidity 42
Or OP does at least, I wonder if she sucks other things...
kitkatknicknack 12
^lol so true
hellbilly205 17
A bit horny there op?
FrostHeart 36
Why would OPs boyfriend put his hand in his hamster's pee... Or tell your girlfriend to smell it? Mood killer for a failure mood turn on...
theten_fml 9
Now you can tell him how bad it tastes
JaykeXD 9
That was a zinger:D
skullcandifiedDJ 5
soooo... was it any good?
DawnsPlague 0
;)
baconstrips 12
O.o
MrUnicorn 3
"trying to be cute" Yeah, saliva on my fingers is really sexy.
hipsterteen 7
Your boyfriend, how old is he exactly?
MagicallyFat 12
Hipster scum
LiveLaughFML 10
he's not a hipster but he can make her hips stirrr
upyourzlolz 11
From Pittsburgh, smoking papers or a swisher.
chickenwalrus 14
welcome to the cam rellim chronicles lookin out my monocle
chickenwalrus 14
welcome to the cam rellim chronicles lookin out my monocle
peete182 0
Dont suck things that have been holding hamsters
amanda_d95 9
Wow I thought your picture really put emphasis on your comment
JustTemporary 24
as did I.
ndhin831 2
On the plus side, your willingness to suck anything that gets near your mouth qualifies you as an awesome girlfriend.
whorerhorror 6
um, gag me.
kittykat1497 7
I will with OP's boyfriends hamster piss covered fingers.
ellybelly_502 4
Ew! I agree... Gag me indeed
Epsilonyx 15
What happened for you to believe sucking on someone's fingers is cute?
marpay 11
Some people think its reminiscent of sucking a penis and it gets them hot. I've never understood why, but it is what is is.
Epsilonyx 15
So "cute" is now synonymous with "orally-reminiscent"? I need to get with the times, man.
leadman1989 16
A chick sucking on any part of my body is hot.
False_Stupidity 42
Sucking on various body parts is not only cute, but playful and depending on the part, erotic :)
InYourAtmosphere 0
It IS cute. I know it doesn't sound that way but it is. I've done it. But it wasn't a wise idea to do it after he was playing with a hamster..
My_Nightmare 19
Sounds like a good way to catch worms to me
datgamerchick 14
Sucking someone else's fingers is not cute. Babies are cute. Puppies are cute.
GummyBearPower13 0
Ur cute xD
muggle_born 6
Random: I dont know how to message on this so I'm just gonna right it here lol, your deathly Hallows necklace is friggin amazin, k good day(: lol
xNephilim 19
Idk about cute, but my fiancé gets turned on by it like you wouldn't believe...
ryukk_fml 3
Did it taste as good as it smelled?
Lstands4LOSER 0
Hamster pee? Yeah, because that shit's supposed to taste delicious
MwahFMLS 6
Yum.
ikickgingers 15
I just effing threw up in my mouth.
Blueglasscup 18
Think we all did. Ugh...
ZTD09 2
Drinking hamster pee is not gross?
KiddNYC1O 22
Someone has a hamster-pee fetish.
ellakacyme22 6
Drinking is a bit much its not like she had a full cup pee in it.