Today, I discovered that my downstairs neighbor is running a business out of her apartment. Or I should say, her pimp is. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I figured out that the roommate who I let move in with me on Sunday is probably a prostitute. I’m a lawyer. FML
Today, I discovered that my roommate is a drug dealer and has been keeping her product in our flat. I discovered this when several police officers broke down my bathroom door and arrested me while I was in the shower. FML
Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML
Today, I found out the friend I signed a lease with is actually a wanted drug dealer. I only found this out after the police kicked in the door at 5am and raided our house. FML
Today, I found out that my seemingly innocent 80-something neighbor has been stalking every girl in the neighborhood, and considers me his girlfriend. FML
Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbor has a cat. I was blessed with this knowledge when she threw several piles of used kitty litter and cat poop over her balcony and onto my patio. FML
Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML
Today, my next-door neighbor decided to become a rapper. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Today, I learned that my apartment building has two new tenants: my ex-girlfriend and her fiancé, the guy she cheated on me with. FML
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Top comments
Connect 10
You should see opportunity here. Set up a condom stand in the hallway.
nickjam19 5
Call the cops on them when they're in "business".
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Comments (110)
perdix 31
Ask him to teach you the "pimp slap." I'm not exactly sure what that is, but it somehow sounds useful for self-defense (or self-offense.)
Cupcake040 17
I agree with 22 in just stay on your own course but also if there's ever a point to which it get uncomfortable to be in your home tell the superintendent........your priority should be your safety
EnterFMLHere 17
Where did you say this place was again?
Miki101 18
It might be a great opprotunity for you!
slingo234 12
World worst tenants much?
davek 36
Ever heard of "mates' rates"?
athos1237 4
Try calling the cops instead of posting it here. That's how you make it stop.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Tell the leasing office.
ballbearing 10
I rented a rather nice apartment in a 'better' area of the city. I had a cabbie tell me that in fact one of the suites was a well know "trick pad" for high end call girls. Not every prostitute is forced into it, some girls actually like sex and if they can get paid, why not? The girls I saw in the building looked very clean, well dressed and usually seemed happy. I saw no need to run to the police.
ThatPlankton 15
Legal in Canada unfortunately (got some "working" in the apartment beside me).
ballbearing 10
It's not legal in Canada. While the actual act is not criminal, it is criminal to communicate for the purpose is prostitution and it is criminal to live off the proceeds of prostitution. Therefore it criminalizes the profession. Merely another form of patriarchy, criminalizing the most basic economic commodity a female has.