Today, I came home and found that my home had been robbed. The worst part? One of the thieves took a dump in my toilet and didn't flush. It doesn't even look human. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML
Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML
Today, I got burgled. Not only did he steal my TV and game consoles, but he took a huge diarrhea dump in my underwear drawer and wiped his ass with my tailored suit. The dry cleaner won't accept it because it's a biohazard. FML
Today, I woke up to find my house TP'd. I also noticed our entire house was devoid of toilet paper. Someone had broken in just to steal our toilet paper and TP our own house with it. FML
Today, I got home from a holiday to find out that my flatmate had thrown a party. Everything seemed fine at first, then I noticed that someone had taken a dump in my running shoes that were in my bedroom closet. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML
Today, my house was broken into. Nothing was stolen, but my laptop had feces smeared all over it. FML
Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML
Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML
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Top comments
SexyMexi21 23
Ew. man I'm sorry. hopefully they find who it is!
wRIPPERw 23
Chin up, OP. Those are just things. And flush the toilet...
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Comments (201)
ndnpride88 25
Well there's your DNA sample
MissSarcasm01 18
At least the police has evidence to catch the robbers...right?
sleepingangel 10
DNA from the dumb maybe?
Blaze248 10
just sayin whoever the robber was he left evidence behind
pitapizzaparty 18
Do u think it could have DNA of who did it? Idk that was a stupid question :o
Cherhorowitz 25
At least they didn't take a dump anywhere else. But sorry to hear that OP must of been disgusting!
thecrazymancan 17
To anyone saying that he left DNA: It doesn't matter. The police don't use DNA evidence unless it's either a rape or murder. They just don't think it's worth the money to test it.
BloodyGirlJuli 0
Apparently the theives must have been someone you know or knew of your whereabouts and how long you would be gone if they are that confident that theyd be able to rob you and still have a chance to drop a load. Karma maybe?
killthedead 13
Crimes are for kids!
LiliLatte 15
I think it's trying to communicate Seriously, none of that made sense