Today, I came back home after a year studying abroad. Imagine my surprise when I found out my mom had gotten breast implants while I was away. All through dinner, I kept catching myself staring at them. No wonder my dad was so much happier than when I left. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I flew home to visit my parents. We haven't seen each other in two years, I've gotten a few tattoos done since, and I knew they wouldn't approve, so I bought whole new outfits that covered everything and looked professional. When I got there, the first thing my mom says to me is, "Is that a nose ring!?" FML
Today, I came home to tell my parents about my new nose job I got about a month ago. My mom always told me I should get one, so I didn't tell her right away to see if she would notice. I was home for about 20 minutes before she asked me, "So when are you getting that nose job?" FML
Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML
Today, I spent my first day with my parents for the first time in a year as I've been away at university. My dad went to work, and my mum spent the whole day playing mahjong with her friends as they all told me "how fat I've gotten" and how "boys won't like it". FML
Today, I paid a surprise visit to my parents, after having moved out for university last year. My room had been stripped bare and all the family photos featuring me were missing from the wall. When I asked why, my mom asked me in return why I was asking stupid questions. FML
Today, my father-in-law asked me if I have breast implants in front of the whole family for the third time this month. FML
Today, I was laying in bed facing my dad. In the middle of our conversation, I noticed he became interested in something behind me. I turn around to the sight of my mom lifting up her shirt, flashing her boobs. FML
Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML
Today, I found out that my extremely-flat chested cousin recently got a boob job. When my mom found out, she said "Oh that's great! They look so good!". Then she looks at me and tells me that I should get one. Everyone including my own mother thinks I should get a boob job. FML
Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML
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Top comments
Becca_Bear_98 19
well it does supply more cushioning if she ever falls front forward . . .
xlord 27
Anyone in a loving relationship will tell you. It's all about the personalitits.
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Comments (76)
The_Big_Boss 20
Ask her how much they were
colby6666 43
It's his mom! That's just weird.
Demig0d6 14
Tit is pretty weird
Wakachulak 22
Chill out Colby, asking about the price is not THAT weird...
colby6666 43
59- It's still pretty weird if you ask me.
hxnnxh 14
OP is a guy, so the price is probably irrelevant to him..
Emma Marshall 19
They're about $6000 lol depending where you go
Becca_Bear_98 19
well it does supply more cushioning if she ever falls front forward . . .
gjikvtj 18
I fully support breast implants on the back because it's harder to break your fall if you fall backwards.
cakefete2 31
That's what butt implants are for. I mean why else would anybody get them?
Onyxdragon 9
that just means you hit your head
Vintage_Cola 29
MILF
JacobFrench 16
Gg
Adam5858 17
Well you can always go back!
cakefete2 31
Yea, while OP is studying abroad, his dad can get back to studying a broad, namely OP's mom.
Brandi_Faith 34
But if he goes back he may come home again to his dad getting butt implants. Probably best OP just stays where he is.
RedPillSucks 33
Butt at least he wont catch himself staring at those
xlord 27
Anyone in a loving relationship will tell you. It's all about the personalitits.
Swedish_Eagle 21
big boobs, im lovin em
JMichael 26
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
now why don't you pretend like you're 5 years old again and go lay on mommy's chest
cakefete2 31
That's disgusting. Why would he cop a feel on his own mom?
kittina 22
That's disgusting...
Saraishi 25
Ewww. Just ewww.
krystenk93 23
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little after reading that...
slipstreak 10
what the **** is wrong with you, #6?
BloodyGirlJuli 0
Your sick then. Do remember she is your mother...
Mauskau 36
I sometimes look at my mum's chest, and my nan's, just so I know what to look forward to. (obviously they're wearing clothes).
ChristianH39 30
You're* and you're a little quick to judge OP as sick. He never said he was attracted to his mom. That's not exactly a small change to get used to
Chaoticthor 8
Incest inbound? heh.
nellbell414 13
Or more like shocked? Maybe? I would act the same way if all of a sudden my mother had giant boobs.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Those belong to Big Poppa buddy. You had your fun already.
Vagitarian1 10
Thanks for the mammaries.
Leo619 20
Even though they weren't so great