Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML
Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
Today, I was feeding my pets and playing with my puppy when I suddenly felt something behind me. My cat is on the arm of the couch steadily spanking my butt with his paw. I can't win! FML
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
Today, I was watching a video about spiders. When I felt a tickle on my foot, I kicked hard in panic. It was one of our newborn kittens walking. I almost killed it. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
Today, my puppy celebrated a milestone by lifting his leg to pee for the first time. Too bad it was up against my brand new soft fabric couch. FML
Today, while I was cooking, my dogs were messing around behind me. I suddenly felt a painful bite on my ass cheek and instinctively kicked back. I then realized it was my 3-year-old daughter, who was laying on the floor crying with a nose bleed. FML
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Top comments
random__user 0
You deserved it, you idiot. The puppy didn't though.
sexyx0sandyyy 0
awww! poor puppy!!! how cute/sad!
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Comments (359)
pepzairz 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....this has to be the funniest thing i have ever read!!!
TrueLover 0
Lmao. There r so many comments I didn't even bother readin past #20. #7, STFU. The puppy doesn't do it to spite them. It does it cuz it's scared. And I totally get that. It's nose or brush of fur could have definately felt like a bug. Or maybe she was just standing nearby and your leg itched. Still: poor puppy! It'll get over it soon though... It's still rlly young.
Amy_10 0
aw poor puppy. i've done that so many times to my cats and dogs. anything can feel like a mosquito or bug when it brushes up against your leg. just go up to your puppy and pet it. it'll eventually forget the whole thing.
lozerboy7 0
YDI ur a lozer
Sweet_heart_fml 0
AWE tha's terrible! i know it was on accident but still...
rachelizzie 0
that's cause you didn't apologize and snuggle him afterward. :[ how does kicking a mosquito help, anyway!?
Dot_ComSLASHyou 0
YOU F-ING PUPPY ABUSER!! take that damn dog back to the pound u aint fit to take care of that thing!!!
yaypolarbears 0
u should bring it to a trainer/dog expert to help it get over it =[
Gotz_No_Love 1
poor puppy :(
gymrat 0
wow. i dont even know you and i hate you. poor puppy! i hope you feel like a dick. next time look before you kick anything dbag.