Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML
Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
Today, I was feeding my pets and playing with my puppy when I suddenly felt something behind me. My cat is on the arm of the couch steadily spanking my butt with his paw. I can't win! FML
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
Today, I was watching a video about spiders. When I felt a tickle on my foot, I kicked hard in panic. It was one of our newborn kittens walking. I almost killed it. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
Today, my puppy celebrated a milestone by lifting his leg to pee for the first time. Too bad it was up against my brand new soft fabric couch. FML
Today, while I was cooking, my dogs were messing around behind me. I suddenly felt a painful bite on my ass cheek and instinctively kicked back. I then realized it was my 3-year-old daughter, who was laying on the floor crying with a nose bleed. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
random__user 0
You deserved it, you idiot. The puppy didn't though.
sexyx0sandyyy 0
awww! poor puppy!!! how cute/sad!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (359)
Sucks2beYouxD 0
POOR PUPPY!!!
PredyJessica 0
if shes washing the dishes then her hands arent free so of course u kick the mosquito temp...even my cat touches my leg and i feel like its a fly..if you don't have a pet then you wouldn't understand..but dam poor dog =l
wishfullthinking_fml 0
PLEASE DO NOT RUB THE PUPPY's FACE IN ITS PEE!!! If you think the poor thing is scared of you know, do that and you will have a mentally scarred animal for the rest of it's life. You need to spend some extra time regaining its trust, being gentle but not subservient, and encouraging the puppy to come hang out with you all over the house until it knows you mean it no harm. Next time you think u have a bug...please look before kicking!!! BTW, i recently stepped on my cats tail and while trying to regain my balance, managed to kick him......i know how awful it feels!!!
philip333333 0
agree with #2
LinneaHall 0
Poor little puppy!!
at0micmin3r 23
I hate to do this, but I call a YDI. I REALLY hope you can patch things with your puppy soon!!! ;_;
mansen 15
It's ok, it happens. First night I ever had my cat (first time ever owning a cat) the wee little kitten was sleeping above my head. In the middle of the night I felt something kneading my head and scratching my scalp and I was still mostly asleep. So...out of basic reaction I just grabbed and threw. I woke up pretty fast when I heard a little 'mew' as she was flying through the air. But she was unharmed and 12 years later she still sleeps above my head. I trip over my two chihuahuas all the time, they get underfoot and have been accidentally booted. They sometimes forget to watch for feet and I forget to watch for them, but they still love to cuddle. And my other cat loves to play a 'game' I call lets try to kill the human, by twining between my legs at the top of the stairs, he gets booted while I go flailing. Point is, accidents happen, animals recover, forgive and some of them even make games of trying to get you to fall :P
kenzedie 0
Okay, #7, you do not rub a dog's nose in pee, I'm sorry but that is cruel. Poor dog, I'm sure he'll warm up to you in a while, but at least it was an accident, and you didn't badley hurt the puppy.
MetalCraze 11
OK Morons if you start swatting a puppy who is fearful he will start snapping when he gets older because in his mind there is no other way to stop you from hitting him. my parents own a kennel
blobxmaster13 0
Poor doggy. :'(. You so deserve it.