Today, as a joke, my friends plastic wrapped me to my bed while I was sleeping, I had an allergic reaction to the plastic and had to have the girl I like come cut me out and give me my meds. I sleep naked and was unable to put on clothes during this time. She saw me naked, swollen and with hives. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML
Today, I woke up with a wax strip on my chest and my girlfriend sitting next to me on the bed laughing. She pulled the strip. I screamed. FML
Today, while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML
Today, my "friend" put itching powder in my cast while I was sleeping. FML
Today, alone on Valentine's day, I decided to eat chocolate and watch romantic comedies in bed. I had an allergic reaction to the chocolate which sent me to the ER. FML
Today, I decided to take a relaxing shower. My face mask made my face break out in hives. While exfoliating, my nipples became chafed. Then I slipped and cut myself while shaving. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the emergency room because my girlfriend thought it would be funny to superglue my penis to my thigh while I was sleeping. FML
Today, I had to drive my girlfriend to the hospital because she had a severe allergic reaction to the flowers I brought her. FML
Today, I woke up suddenly with giant bugs biting my legs. I screamed, ripped the blanket off the bed and bolted to the bathroom to recover. Turns out it was all a dream, and the person who needed to recover most was my shell-shocked boyfriend who had been sleeping soundly beside me. Sorry, babe. FML
Today, I was riding a longboard down a hill and I fell off. I was all scraped up so I made sure to clean my wounds and put bandages on them. Turns out I'm allergic to the glue on the bandages and I have itchy hives all over and around my open wounds. FML
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Top comments
Truthbringer 0
why did you have to call the girl that you like to help you out in that situation? seems like you could have called anyone.
Fidelis_fml 0
Good call, calling the girl you like... What happened after? I bet *it* looked a bit bigger cause of the swelling...
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Comments (114)
KT33 0
#20--He never said he called anyone.
dcapp 0
why'd you "get" the girl you liked to help you??
Guairdean 0
If she'll still date you, she's definitely a keeper. Far too many girls are there for the good times, but one glimpse of the bad times will drive them away. Treat her like gold, she deserves it.
Link5794 18
Yes, keep her in a velvet-lined box and do try not to get any scratches on her.
Neenertastic 0
Your meds? I hope your friends didn't know that you were allergic to plastic wrap, cuz that sucks... ...and a slightly sadistic prank?
oneinamillion 0
i assume ur girl is in fire/ems/rescue like me... don't worry about it. For one, there is probably a law in your state that forbids her from spreading information around. two, in my personal experience, i would much rather see what happened to you, than somone lose their penis in an accident, which has happened, or an old man who is far too happy to be having a young girl work on him. i know its embarassing, but at least it's something... and in my case, when i have taken good looking young guys that i know to the hospital, either they develop a thing for me, or i get a little crush on them... i know it seems terrible, but trust me, it could be worse. just make sure shes not working next time u go overboard with the boos, puking on her will not help... hang in there!
FML625 0
seriously why did you call the girl you liked? and i'm with #20 if you could call someone then why couldn't you get yourself out. and also, how do you not notice people plastic wrapping you to the bed? you must be a heavy sleeper. i wake up as soon as someone touches my door knob. i suggest you start locking your door!
gregthestrange 3
get pity sex!
SW11 0
#27 agreed.
radiodj94 0
You can't just have allergic reactions to anything. Plastic is generally hypoallergenic. Liar.
wilson0949 0
no it's not dumb ass and It could hav been latex based
esushi 0
Hmm, I'm a little skeptical, too--but a lot of people are allergic to adhesives and some plastic wraps have a little bit of something on them, right? The super-clingy kind?