Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend masturbate next to me and then relieves himself on my bed sheets. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me the thing that gets him really horny. Apple sauce. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML
Today, while licking maple syrup off my wife during foreplay, I probably shouldn't have referred to her breasts as pancakes. FML
Today, my boyfriend let it slip that he thinks of my best friend when he masturbates because he like to have the "freedom and variety." FML
Today, after telling my boyfriend I was willing to try just about anything to revive our sex life, he confessed to having a swirly fetish. FML
Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML
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Top comments
Thizzkidsgotgame 7
Sweet.
toelie 26
There's just no pleasing some women. Be happy his fantasy features you at all.
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Comments (199)
shaniqwa 0
The song.. "sex syrup" look it up..
HoesKnowMe 2
Hahaha best fml of the day I'm still laughing
ObeyStudKing 4
Hide aunt Jemima and any other syrup you have.
Chica2517 3
Wow
onorexveritas 24
food and sex are closely related ;)
sorrowsangel89 1
Lol I agree with comment 8. My last bf only thought about other women. If a man thinks about me in any normal or weird fashion I consider it a good thing.
ben827 10
I'd be flattered. That means he finds you really attractive.
maryd195 0
i'd put some syrup on myself to tease him ;) if he likes it then i'd be down for it. haha
Obvious8 3
I'm pretty sure that's called "Canadian ****"
Obvious8 3