Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Handjob
Today, I heard my boyfriend masturbate next to me and then relieves himself on my bed sheets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Gabi
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend would rather jerk off than have sex with me. Even if I'm next to him in bed. FML
awkward O_o
Saint Paul, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML
anon
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out my boyfriend watches porn. Specifically, today, while I was in the shower. In the next room. We were alone in the house and he still chose porn. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
So frustratiiiiing
Today, I caught my boyfriend masturbating, again. Meanwhile we haven’t had sex in weeks. FML
whoawhoawhoa
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
ashbeat
Sydney, Australia 🌶️ Spicy
MY EARS! MY EARS!
Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Cougartown
Today, my boyfriend snuck out of my room so he could have sex with my mom in the next room. FML
anon
Rocklin, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
mmvv
United States
Today, I found out the hard way that my boyfriend occasionally wets the bed. He's 25 and we're moving in together next month. FML
hannieannie
Oxford, United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
Top comments
Charlie Given 28
Ya should have given him a hand😂
Jackey 29
Sounds like he needs to wash the sheets. There's a cost to all fun.
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Comments (12)
RichardPencil 32
Why weren't you involved?
krray 7
Consider yourself lucky then -- I would've gone for the face shot myself.
KingAdrock 16
First offf the phrase "relieved him[them]self" does not usually refer to ejaculation. You make it sound like he pissed the bed. Secondly... so what? So he got some spooge on the sheets. Big deal. Who the hell in this day and age finds masturbation objectionable?
Charlie Given 28
Ya should have given him a hand😂
Jackey 29
Sounds like he needs to wash the sheets. There's a cost to all fun.
jbuckets_404 39
Guess who's doing laundry TODAY?! (And, yes, it's him else he gets the floor, not even the sofa.)
mfranks19891989 10
Ewww he came on the bed sheets and then wants you and him sleep in the bed with the sperm sheets. That’s nasty!
Bevis Butthead 4
kind of new at this whole sex thingy, huh?
wawa_sxm 15
that was funny!!
Fiona Ashe 9
Honestly this would be fine but: i dated someone who would always ********** and then wipe it on the same spot on the bed sheet. When it came off to get washed that corner was BROWN and HARD. sperm honestly stains.
sxdryv 14
i dont know the dynamic so nothing personal but why wouldn't you have joined in and helped him out? If rolls were reversed and i heard my gf going at it, i would definitely lend a hand, tongue or D. ;) just sayin.
Cameron Short 9
maybe should of offred to help and let him "relieve" himself in your mouth...no mess to clean up then