Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend masturbate next to me and then relieves himself on my bed sheets. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me the thing that gets him really horny. Apple sauce. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML
Today, while licking maple syrup off my wife during foreplay, I probably shouldn't have referred to her breasts as pancakes. FML
Today, my boyfriend let it slip that he thinks of my best friend when he masturbates because he like to have the "freedom and variety." FML
Today, after telling my boyfriend I was willing to try just about anything to revive our sex life, he confessed to having a swirly fetish. FML
Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Thizzkidsgotgame 7
Sweet.
toelie 26
There's just no pleasing some women. Be happy his fantasy features you at all.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (199)
Sneekys 2
OMG, i bet you cant guess what im doing now......
peoplepainter 1
Hey, it's still you he's masturbating about. Be happy!
j3ebrules 13
Oooh... Sticky. Flattering maybe... But mostly sticky.
ReflexEight 6
Hey, at least it's about you.
Zacham 5
nothing wrong with that. you should pour pancake syrup on yourself infront of him. if he is masturbating to you after 2 years the dude deserves something. I'd say you have a keeper
Austyn57 1
its normal
BenL97 5
I thought of the candy bar commercial with the swimmers in caramel.
magwich 19
Is he Canadian?
avierg 2
Make his fantasy come true
Rebekkah1993 10
At least he is thinking of you..