Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I showed my new tattoo to my friends. It's supposed to be a deep, philosophical quote in Latin, symbolizing strength and resilience. My friend, who happens to be fluent in Latin, started laughing hysterically. Turns out, it actually says, "You are dumb." FML
Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML
Today, a woman yelled at me for hurting her. I'm a tattoo artist. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML
Today, my friend sent me a link to a "horrible" tattoo that he found online, that a guy had gotten at my tattoo parlor. FML
Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML
Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML
Today, I discovered that my best friend of 3 years has me in her phone as "Stupid Bitch". FML
Today, a close, funny friend who has quite the attitude, received a long email from a long-time friend of hers, telling her how difficult she is. When I told her it doesn’t matter, that she is still wonderful, she went off on how bad a friend I am for saying that, and then deleted me off WhatsApp. FML
Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML
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Top comments
joeymo304 9
Not your problem she's defective
NIRVANA1990s 1
hey its her fault she's a bitch
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Comments (186)
Ohreo 2
I got that bitch a tattoo. Bitches love tattoos.
LGFUADnow 12
She really is a bad bitch
vintage3113 6
Good riddance
Leslier_fml 4
What a stupid bitch! Ha ha good for her that her tattoo actually says that. It suits her perfect cuz something is definetly wrong with her for reacting like that. You were just telling her the truth right?
ebfbruh 0
Sounds like she is one defective female...
TheComputerGuy96 16
If you try to translate bitch in google translate it would have given you the word "cagna" which means bitch, but as "female dog," so not too bad. For everyone's information, bad bitch is "puttana cattiva" and defective female is "femmina difettosa."
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
I thought puttana was *****. Kind of like puta in Spanish.
TheComputerGuy96 16
***** and bitch are synonyms.
aardvarkish 17
I was actually thinking, if I were a tattoo artist, and some one wanted "bad bitch" I would just give "Villain Chien" (that's French, but I'm sure the Italian is similar) and let the observer decide the wearer may be.
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
Actually, "chien" is the masculine form of dog. "Chienne" means bitch/female dog. (:
pastywhitekid 10
Really it's more like f her life for not verifying what the tattoo actually meant first. Shame she had to act like such a tart to you though.
quontag 15
Stop making fun of defective females
PunkySpunky78 15
I looked it up on trans and defective female is difettoso femminile and bad bitch is cagna male
mea_iloveskiing 26
You wrote the last sentence like a sir, OP.