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Today, my dog took a dump beside the air intake for our furnace. The house now smells like dog crap. FML

#18457240
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21073) - you deserved it (3540)

On 12/07/2011 at 11:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML

#20454623
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21072) - you deserved it (35986)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nean83 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad explained to me the "chain of command" for our house. McKinley, Mom, himself, Charlie, then me. McKinley is my two year old daughter and Charlie is the dog. He was dead serious. FML

#13623342
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21071) - you deserved it (5034)

On 10/28/2010 at 2:39am - animals - by katie06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching TV and there were penguins laying eggs. He said, "Penguins are mammals, they don't lay eggs." I replied, "Penguins are birds." We fought about it for ages until he realised that I was right, and has since stopped talking to me. FML

#20054655
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21071) - you deserved it (2284)

On 09/02/2012 at 8:10pm - animals - by difference between birds and mammals. - Australia

Today, I was in class and noticed that it smelled strongly of cat urine. I smelled my shoulder and realized that my cat had peed on my sweater. I had six hours of classes left, and the smell had permeated my shirt. FML

#8094791
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21072) - you deserved it (5391)

On 02/10/2010 at 4:19pm - animals - by snickerdoodles (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband invited his boss and his wife to dinner. During the meal, I tasted the wine and apologised for its bad quality, somewhat annoyed: "Dont drink that, I'll go and look for another bottle." Unfortunately, it was our guests who had brought the wine in question. FML

#416
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21070) - you deserved it (8832)

On 11/29/2008 at 11:11am - misc - by Buzz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I received a call while at the dispatch station for the Naval hospital I work at. It was a woman having a panic attack. Apparently, she couldn't plug her vacuum in, and was more or less freaking out. I had to take her in anyway. FML

#12162115
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21067) - you deserved it (2501)

On 07/28/2010 at 7:42am - work - by HM (man) - United States (Armed Forces Pacific)

Today, I sneezed while at the office. I felt snot shoot out, but I couldn't see anything on the tissue. I ignored it and went on with my day. When I went to the bathroom hours later, I noticed a huge wad of snot had dried onto the front of my shirt. No one told me about it. FML

#19214388
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21062) - you deserved it (3691)

On 03/04/2012 at 2:36pm - health - by breebree-0 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to give a speech on abstinence to a bunch of teenage boys, and surprisingly they were paying attention. After they left, I went to the bathroom and saw I had missed a few buttons on my blouse. The boys had a close up view of my cleavage for 3 hours. FML

#831890
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21059) - you deserved it (59008)

On 04/06/2009 at 6:41am - misc - by Anna (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom sent me beautiful candlesticks along with some half burned candles. I thanked her. She told me the candlesticks were a wedding gift to my grandmother 85 years ago. Then she said the candles were used at my grandma's wedding. I had already lit them. FML

#9177145
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21056) - you deserved it (7319)

On 03/18/2010 at 12:46am - misc - by knews - United States (Missouri)

Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML

#8842
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21055) - you deserved it (4175)

On 02/04/2009 at 8:18pm - misc - by Michigan (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my swimming coach made us swim fifty laps non-stop as punishment for his previous class being unable to swim a drill properly. They're 8-11 year olds who are still learning to swim. I feel like my arms and legs are filled with lead. FML

#20041381
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21055) - you deserved it (1901)

On 08/25/2012 at 5:59pm - health - by blue (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I decided it would be pretty amusing to press the "Like" button on everyone's status on Facebook without reading them just to get on peoples' nerves. After re-reading them later, I found out one of them said "I MISS YOU SOO MUCH GRANDMOM. RIP". I liked that her grandmother died. FML

#316205
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21050) - you deserved it (184091)

On 03/14/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by like - United States (Pennsylvania)



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