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Today, I went to a fancy charity dinner. I'm a schmoozer, so I decided to introduce myself to someone important. I asked enthusiastically, "So, how are you involved with all of this madness?" He frowned at me. I then remembered that this particular charity assists people with mental issues. FML

#21164174
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21188) - you deserved it (37925)

On 06/05/2014 at 6:23pm - misc - by charitableidiot (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to help a friend move into her new apartment. We were half-way through when it started to rain, and in my anger I yelled that it's like these things happen just to annoy me. Then we heard the tornado sirens. FML

#19203363
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21185) - you deserved it (3667)

On 03/02/2012 at 4:15pm - misc - by wtf did I do - United States

Today, my mobile phone wouldn't turn on. I took it in to the phone store, but they won't fix or replace it because the account is in my dad's name, not mine. He's abroad for the next month, and the only way to get a hold of him is on a number I only stored on my phone. FML

#19511679
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21185) - you deserved it (5027)

On 04/22/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by dontbuysamsung (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I fractured a bone in my knee. Now not only do I have to wear a huge knee brace for the next two months, I'll have to sit around in a hotel room all of next week while my family has fun skiing in the mountains. FML

#19378984
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21180) - you deserved it (2213)

On 03/30/2012 at 9:43pm - health - by Fractured - United States

Today, I went to my favorite burger joint. Upon taking the first bite of my burger, I dislocated my jaw, and the waiters had to call 911. FML

#19990108
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21179) - you deserved it (2290)

On 07/29/2012 at 1:15am - health - by cherknobil (man) - United States (California)

Today, my cat peed on my bra. I didn't realize this until after I arrived at work for my 12-hour shift. Now I'm trying to wash my bra out in the sink and stuff paper towels down it to soak up the moisture. Only 10 more hours to go, and the smell of cat pee is still lingering. FML

#20185014
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21178) - you deserved it (4150)

On 11/30/2012 at 3:33am - work - by onlyslightly (woman) - United States

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21177) - you deserved it (2433)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML

#557
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21176) - you deserved it (7148)

On 12/20/2008 at 7:23am - kids - by Lola - Sent from mobile version

Today, I paid a surprise visit to my parents, after having moved out for university last year. My room had been stripped bare and all the family photos featuring me were missing from the wall. When I asked why, my mom asked me in return why I was asking stupid questions. FML

#20156480
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21176) - you deserved it (1829)

On 11/09/2012 at 5:03pm - kids - by jan420 (man) - Norway (Ostfold)

Today, I brought a girl home. My dad's first reaction was to pull out the camera and snap away. She now won't reply to my texts or calls. FML

#19374063
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21174) - you deserved it (1911)

On 03/30/2012 at 1:00am - misc - by jasonnn (man) - Australia

Today, I saw a photo on Instagram of my friend flipping the camera the bird. She'd tagged it under "irony", so I jokingly suggested that she borrow a dictionary. She responded with a tirade of abuse, claimed to be sleeping with my boyfriend, and blocked me an hour later. FML

#20398380
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21168) - you deserved it (3050)

On 12/13/2012 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was at the gym and as I was pulling out my earphones and getting off my treadmill, I heard the girl behind me say to her friend on the treadmill next to her, "Wow, there have no cute guys today." Her friend replied, "None at all. It's like everyone suddenly got gay or ugly." FML

#2709
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21166) - you deserved it (1844)

On 01/26/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Rothaar - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my four roommates and I contracted lice. While all our heads were slathered in mayonnaise and saran wrap, our building's fire alarm went off. FML

#20103879
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21165) - you deserved it (2966)

On 10/06/2012 at 3:28am - health - by EastOneTen - United States



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