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Today, I got an offer to study at a good university. My father has been pushing me to apply for years, so I ecstatically broke the news. Instead of congratulating me, he just grunted and delivered the more important news that he's divorcing my mum. Moment ruined. FML

#20443641
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21970) - you deserved it (1491)

On 01/05/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Sad nerd (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, while setting up for a party I was having, I put black lights into our bathroom for the cool bright, neon color you get when you pee. When I turn them on to see where I need to continue cleaning, I see many, small, yellow hand prints on the walls. I have a nine year old brother. FML

#13660294
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21969) - you deserved it (2759)

On 10/31/2010 at 5:05am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had four teeth pulled, and my mom brought me some ice cream to help with the pain. I fell asleep before I could finish it, and without realising, I left the bowl on my bed. I woke up a few hours later with ice cream spilled all over me, my pants, and all over my now-dead phone. FML

#9131869
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21968) - you deserved it (9490)

On 03/16/2010 at 1:40pm - health - by hkkilla - United States

Today, I walked out of my house wearing only boxers, only to be greeted by kids with paintball guns. FML

#17436127
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21968) - you deserved it (13525)

On 08/11/2011 at 12:53am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, at work, my boss asked me why I wasn't adhering to proper dress code. I pointed out that skinny jeans are in the dress code, to which he replied, "Only if you're skinny." FML

#20102886
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21968) - you deserved it (11895)

On 10/05/2012 at 12:40pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking down the street in downtown Charleston where there are a lot of horse-drawn carriage tours and I decided to pick up some litter. Some of it was in a puddle of water, but after I picked up the trash, I realized the puddle was horse urine. FML

#5953331
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21966) - you deserved it (8405)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:22am - animals - by Leash (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I received my first payment of child support from my estranged husband: $50 and a note that said he wouldn't be paying any more. FML

#19335600
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21965) - you deserved it (3261)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized the fastest way to wake up isn't from an alarm clock. It's from the warm, wet sensation of your old and senile cat peeing on you and your bed. I swear he was smiling. FML

#20033618
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21961) - you deserved it (2523)

On 08/21/2012 at 9:04am - animals - by jenA - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while I was working at child care, I told a two year old not to hit. He threw a bucket at me that bounced off my forehead. FML

#12910984
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21960) - you deserved it (4277)

On 09/05/2010 at 12:44am - kids - by kaytay2469 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend kept pressuring me to get it on. I told him I was self-conscious abut my stomach and didn't want him to see it. His response? My double chin doesn't keep him from kissing me. FML

#5638225
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21960) - you deserved it (7108)

On 10/04/2009 at 7:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was standing at the top of the stairs petting my dog. The doorbell rang and my dog bolted down the stairs, tripping me. I fell down the whole flight of stairs backwards. Turns out the person at the door was my brother who had locked himself out. I almost died for no reason. FML

#8118993
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21960) - you deserved it (4460)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:14am - love - by sari14 - United States (Virginia)

Today, on our first holiday together, my boyfriend decided to spend his time reminiscing about having come here once with his ex. He then decided to go type up an email to her about it. FML

#20070220
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21960) - you deserved it (1816)

On 09/13/2012 at 1:46pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I realized that I can still do the splits. Why? Because I fell down an entire flight of stairs, everyone in the hall saw me land and applauded. Someone even shouted "and she sticks the landing." FML

#8965492
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21958) - you deserved it (3147)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by misty_love (woman) - United States (Hawaii)



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