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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was feeling hungry, so I went to the kitchen to get a bowl of cereal. I found hundreds of weevils festering in my Lucky Charms. FML

#7937291
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21749) - you deserved it (3735)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by annony-moose - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I put my 4 year old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

#13450247
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21748) - you deserved it (8294)

On 10/14/2010 at 8:25pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after a week of sporting what I thought was a flattering pixie cut, I realised that without my long hair, my body shape closely resembles a snowman's. FML

#17461404
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21750) - you deserved it (9568)

On 08/13/2011 at 4:29pm - misc - by Karin (woman) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML

#18548047
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21747) - you deserved it (6237)

On 12/18/2011 at 8:52pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband sweetly asked me, "You know what I'd really like to do if I had an extra $4,000?" Expecting a romantic answer, I asked what. He said, "I'd get you a tummy tuck." He still can't figure out what he said wrong. FML

#20125706
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21745) - you deserved it (4356)

On 10/20/2012 at 8:22pm - love - by cargaljen (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that people can get ringworm from cats. I found out because I have ringworm. I don't have a cat. Then I remembered I helped a friend move about two weeks ago, and spent the night sharing a bed with her cat. That's the last time I ever help her move. FML

#13861463
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21741) - you deserved it (3583)

On 11/16/2010 at 2:13am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, after feeling a little down about myself and looking for comfort from my boyfriend, he told me that my stretch marks make me look like a tiger. FML

#19967634
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21742) - you deserved it (3190)

On 07/21/2012 at 11:08am - love - by marquez_jasmine - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had finally gotten my dogs to quiet down and my baby to fall asleep. Not thirty seconds later, my neighbor's car alarm went off. They aren't home for the weekend, and the damn alarm has now been blaring for three hours. FML

#19686709
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21742) - you deserved it (1512)

On 05/27/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by shadow1248 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, and all day, I was forced to listen to one of the kids in my apartment building play their recorder loudly and horribly. She started over whenever she missed a note. I was sick, was getting a migraine from it, and couldn't ask her to stop without her mom yelling at me. FML

#18242720
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21735) - you deserved it (3052)

On 11/13/2011 at 11:46pm - health - by mintypoison (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, the guy I liked for years asked me out. I instantly said yes. As I was walking away, I forgot I was at the top of the stairs and fell down 20 steps. He stood at the top and laughed. FML

#8837679
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21734) - you deserved it (5412)

On 03/05/2010 at 12:24am - love - by harro101 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML

#19381776
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21735) - you deserved it (9941)

On 03/31/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a phone interview with my potential new boss. I was getting excited about the prospects of landing a great job. I had nailed every question the man asked me and right after he told me he'll call me tomorrow if he wants me to come in I sweetly said, "Talk to you tomorrow, Love you" FML

#1723493
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21732) - you deserved it (53467)

On 05/07/2009 at 5:10pm - work - by jobless (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while walking into a hotel room, I passed by a full-sized mirror. My reflection scared me so badly that I punched the mirror, which then shattered and resulted in several cuts to my hand. FML

#20788837
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21729) - you deserved it (37934)

On 07/17/2013 at 5:44pm - misc - by igotsbadluck - United States (Tennessee)



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