Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my mom told me she can't wait for me to turn eighteen so she can turn my room into a place for her to display all her antique glass dolls. FML

#8999294
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23920) - you deserved it (2403)

On 03/11/2010 at 4:07pm - misc - by heartless (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my art project, the one I've been working on for the last two weeks and the first piece I felt really comfortable about turning in, was stolen out of the art cupboard. FML

#8997978
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25056) - you deserved it (1972)

On 03/11/2010 at 2:55pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my extremely loud and nocturnal flatmate phoned me to tell me excitedly that he got an accordion for his birthday. FML

#8994510
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24505) - you deserved it (2632)

On 03/11/2010 at 10:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hillingdon)

Today, I found out that my entire family thinks I have no friends, am expressionless (to quote, "a robot") and that my monotonous voice hints at the suppressed depression hidden deep inside me. According to them, I need psychic evaluation. It all came out at a family reunion. FML

#8993949
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23971) - you deserved it (3277)

On 03/11/2010 at 9:28am - misc - by talhabilal - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, I walk out of my apartment to find that my car is decorated with explicit drawings and "Happy 21st birthday" stuff written all over it. To top it off, my vehicle is completely wrapped in plastic wrap. I'm 22 and my birthday is in December. FML

#8992744
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26217) - you deserved it (2033)

On 03/11/2010 at 7:04am - misc - by er1133 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I tried to demonstrate to my friend how laughably dull our kitchen knives are by swiping one across my palm. Turns out Dad noticed the problem yesterday and sharpened them. FML

#8991320
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10402) - you deserved it (51240)

On 03/11/2010 at 3:13am - misc - by ShowOff (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I got a call from a police department saying that if I didn't move my car from a store's parking lot within the next 15 minutes, they were going to tow it and charge me for the fee. I was at work and the reason I parked it there is because it started smoking and almost caught fire. FML

#8984403
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21047) - you deserved it (4650)

On 03/10/2010 at 10:03pm - misc - by ohemgee (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML

Today, I came home and noticed that sometime while I was at school, someone cut off half of my ponytail. FML

#8971498
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43007) - you deserved it (4321)

On 03/10/2010 at 1:42pm - misc - by Nancy - United States

Today, I discovered my water bottle had leaked and spilled water all over my backpack, ruining my notebooks, soaking my schoolbooks, and destroying my midterm portfolio. FML

#8970857
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27908) - you deserved it (5479)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML

#8972431
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32400) - you deserved it (4138)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by watersport (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out what people really think about the beard I've been proudly growing for over a month. It appears that my face now looks like an unshaven ballsack. FML

#8968653
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9901) - you deserved it (26159)

On 03/10/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by RyanM (man) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, my parents took my laptop, cut the Internet, took my car keys and TV, and removed my bedroom door. Why? Because they thought the plant I was growing for my science project was a marijuana plant. Oh yeah, they took that too. My presentation is tomorrow. FML

#8965755
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36200) - you deserved it (2630)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:39am - misc - by Kevin - Canada (Manitoba)



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