Today, I found out that my friends from high school have yearly meet-ups to catch up and talk about what they've done since school. They've done this for 3 years. I havent even been invited once. FML

by NoFriends / 11/27/2016 at 9:28pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, after three years of dating, my boyfriend finally proposed. To my best friend. FML

by neverdatingagain / 11/27/2016 at 5:07pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

DevilsMetsGiants's comment : Was your best friend dating him behind your back or did he just freakishly pull this out of nowhere? What did she say when he asked? We need to know!

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Today, I was traveling home with my four-year-old son. While we were standing in line at the security checkpoint, I hear the sound of water dripping and turned to find my son urinating on the floor. He'd read a sign that said we weren't allowed to take any liquids with us. FML

by Pissy / 11/27/2016 at 3:15pm / Kids

FalloutScrolls's comment : 4 year old who can read, though! Go you!

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Today, I moved states to be with my soulmate in our new condo. It was also the day I took out a neighbor's balcony with my U-Haul. FML

by crash and burn / 12/01/2016 at 4:41am / United States (California) / Money

Today, my horse learned a new acrobatic trick. Unfortunately, I was still on top of him when he tried to somersault. The horse is fine. I'm in the hospital, fresh out of surgery for a broken femur. FML

by Lizziebelle / 12/01/2016 at 3:07am / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I saw a very pretty girl at the nightclub. She looked at me so I took a sexy pose while drinking, trying to look cool. I put the straw in my nose. FML

by darkdollyone / 05/18/2010 at 9:36pm / Spain

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to be responsible and put parental controls on the Playstation so our kids can't play adult games or watch adult content online. And now, neither can we. FML

by Stigmamma / 11/27/2016 at 3:54am / Love

Today, I was feeling queasy from the flu so I made some soup to see if it would settle my stomach. It didn't, but at least the giant burn I got on my thigh when the soup spilled hurts enough to distract from the nausea. FML

by Lepisma / 11/27/2016 at 2:22am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, the 8 year old that I babysit every week told me that it was sad that I didn't have a boyfriend while he has a girlfriend. I got burned by a 3rd grader. FML

by Babysitter Probs / 11/27/2016 at 12:58am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, after being excited and trying to make plans with all my friends, they all turned out to be busy. After watching Netflix most of the night, I check my Snapchat stories only to see them all hanging out without me at one of their houses. FML

by CollegeStudent / 11/26/2016 at 12:55am / Miscellaneous

hutchinsons2's comment : You sure they're your friends?

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Today, I got to meet the guy that I have been talking to over a dating website. We were having a great time, at least until I managed to randomly fall asleep in front of him. I spent the rest of the day sending text messages trying to explain to him that I suffer from narcolepsy. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2016 at 3:43am / Love

Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got him to sleep, I tried to go to bed. My husband is now snoring, farting and taking up my side of the bed. I desperately need some sleep. FML

by purpletrout / 11/30/2016 at 1:39am / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, my son’s kindergarten teacher asked her students to describe their dad with a word or an expression. In the midst of “kind” dads, “hug” dads and “kiss” dads, I'm the “whisky dad”. FML

by sarvenom / 01/10/2012 at 11:52pm / Belgium (Antwerpen)