Intimacy: Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

By dumbassbuffet - 11/11/2011 15:53 - Canada

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 741

You deserved it 84 066

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Same thing different taste

By sharkgirl4 - 25/08/2014 16:17 - United States - Rialto

Today, I was trying to fix a broken desk fan. I'd taken the guard off and was trying to unscrew the blades, when my roommate decided it'd be funny to plug it in. The blades sliced into my thumb. I need stitches, and he still thinks it's hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 065

You deserved it 4 389

By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 16:57 - United States

Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 560

You deserved it 13 133

By Username - 02/08/2011 02:46 - United States

Today, I found out how painful it is when your ceiling fan falls on you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 458

You deserved it 3 253

By Anonymous - 14/07/2016 00:56 - Canada - Concord

Today, I fell off the top of my bunk bed in my sleep onto a running fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 166

You deserved it 1 570

By thwack - 24/05/2012 18:26 - United States

Today, during a workplace safety exercise at work, I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 084

You deserved it 3 982

By tylerlove361 - 11/02/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 076

You deserved it 34 020

By Chicketi - 11/02/2009 14:45 - Canada

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 983

You deserved it 8 237

Caught

By Boredom - 26/01/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 840

You deserved it 76 207

By irony - 16/08/2009 07:05 - United States

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 940

You deserved it 9 362

Slicy slicy

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I was getting ready for a date, so to avoid stinky pits, I went to put some deodorant on. However, when I raised my arm to apply it, I almost sliced my hand off when I raised it right into the ceiling fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 616

You deserved it 967

every1luvsboners 11

Friday 11 November 2011 18:59

Wrong kind of ********, champ.

Alleged_Cranium 7

Friday 11 November 2011 19:00

You don't quite understand what a ******** is? Do you?

Comments

loopsy_fml 14

Friday 11 November 2011 19:31

Why the **** was your penis anywhere near a desk fan?! Really?

victoriaa52 2

Friday 11 November 2011 19:33

Wtf were you trying I do?

Epikouros 31

Friday 11 November 2011 21:09

He was drying it, of course. Just basic hygiene after taking a leak. Everybody does that in Europe. (My penis told me to respond to Victoria.)

victoriaa52 2

Saturday 12 November 2011 5:21

I see..

MyEpicDemise 7

Friday 11 November 2011 19:34

I don't see how spinning blades are welcoming enough for you to insert your penis into them.

myflowers 0

Friday 11 November 2011 19:36

WTF how the hell does that even happen?

salsa324 0

Friday 11 November 2011 19:42

How does this happen

Ohmygoshh18 0

Friday 11 November 2011 19:43

Lmfao! Wow.... (:

likasumboooodi 0

Friday 11 November 2011 19:44

my dick hurt just by reading that

Grand_Cookie 21

Friday 11 November 2011 19:53

What did we learn??????

tanwantingbest 1

Friday 11 November 2011 19:54

Express circumcision.

thisisbullcrap 2

Friday 11 November 2011 19:58

why would you stick your penis on a desk fan? thats stupid

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You deserved it 7 982

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I agree, your life sucks 11 064

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I agree, your life sucks 40 129

You deserved it 3 848

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You deserved it 522

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I agree, your life sucks 2 416

You deserved it 161

Same thing different taste

Caught

Slicy slicy

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