Intimacy: Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

By dumbassbuffet - 11/11/2011 15:53 - Canada

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 741

You deserved it 84 066

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Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By sharkgirl4 - 25/08/2014 16:17 - United States - Rialto

Today, I was trying to fix a broken desk fan. I'd taken the guard off and was trying to unscrew the blades, when my roommate decided it'd be funny to plug it in. The blades sliced into my thumb. I need stitches, and he still thinks it's hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 065

You deserved it 4 389

By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 16:57 - United States

Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 560

You deserved it 13 133

By Username - 02/08/2011 02:46 - United States

Today, I found out how painful it is when your ceiling fan falls on you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 458

You deserved it 3 253

By Anonymous - 14/07/2016 00:56 - Canada - Concord

Today, I fell off the top of my bunk bed in my sleep onto a running fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 166

You deserved it 1 570

By thwack - 24/05/2012 18:26 - United States

Today, during a workplace safety exercise at work, I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 084

You deserved it 3 982

By tylerlove361 - 11/02/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 076

You deserved it 34 020

By Chicketi - 11/02/2009 14:45 - Canada

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 983

You deserved it 8 237

Caught

By Boredom - 26/01/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 840

You deserved it 76 207

By irony - 16/08/2009 07:05 - United States

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 940

You deserved it 9 362

Slicy slicy

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I was getting ready for a date, so to avoid stinky pits, I went to put some deodorant on. However, when I raised my arm to apply it, I almost sliced my hand off when I raised it right into the ceiling fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 616

You deserved it 967

every1luvsboners 11

Friday 11 November 2011 18:59

Wrong kind of ********, champ.

Alleged_Cranium 7

Friday 11 November 2011 19:00

You don't quite understand what a ******** is? Do you?

Comments

columbiancoffeei 6

Friday 11 November 2011 19:59

ummm wtf. dude lol what would prompt you to even put your dick anywhere near a fan kudos for the originality though ha

CuteDumBlonde64 11

Friday 11 November 2011 20:02

Your not a boy anymore:)

guitgod1 11

Friday 11 November 2011 20:03

what the...why....I mean, how would you even? I give up, you're an idiot.

MaRyJaNeRulz 0

Friday 11 November 2011 20:05

Too many blunts mate?

megamandude455 10

Friday 11 November 2011 20:17

How???

CHOMP3R 0

Friday 11 November 2011 20:18

This is probably the shortest FML I have ever read.

Fl9C1 4

Friday 11 November 2011 20:22

Wtf? Fan 1 penis 0

bigtaytay 13

Friday 11 November 2011 20:22

Peter Griffin did it in a pencil sharpener, way to step it up a notch dude

tennisrapper1 14

Friday 11 November 2011 20:23

A desk fan has nothing to do with a ******. Just saying.

amishfury 9

Friday 11 November 2011 20:24

NEVER put your penis near a spinning blade moron

Keywords

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Same thing different taste

Caught

Slicy slicy

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