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Today, I went to the hospital to get my ingrown toenail removed. The doctors put me on a little surgery table and told me to relax. They then injected anesthetic into my toe four times and used a pair of scissors to slowly cut through my nail. Only, the anesthetic hadn't started to work just yet. FML

#8474571
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30047) - you deserved it (2466)

On 02/20/2010 at 10:13am - health - by papertrains (woman) - Singapore

Today, I found out that my mother was having an affair with my boss "to help me keep my job" because she thought I was useless. FML

#8474459
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27305) - you deserved it (2195)

On 02/20/2010 at 10:05am - work - by Nik - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was in pain due to overdoing it at the gym yesterday, so I thought a hot shower might help. Not only was there no hot water because of my sister's hour long showers, but I slipped getting out and hit my head. Now the pain is worse. FML

#8473008
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22827) - you deserved it (2993)

On 02/20/2010 at 9:03am - health - by bcoper - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend proposed. Three hours later, he called me to tell me he was kidding. FML

#8472964
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38302) - you deserved it (2196)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:59am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML

#8472938
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10918) - you deserved it (37911)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:58am - misc - by Rach (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I took the train to work. There was an older man standing behind me. Everytime I tried to edge away from him, he edged closer. Everytime the train rocked even slightly, his crotch made contact with my behind. It was an extremely bumpy train ride. I could also tell when he became hard. FML

#8471293
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25281) - you deserved it (2761)

On 02/20/2010 at 5:54am - intimacy - by trainhump (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I finally got to hook up with this hot guy I'd been talking to for a few weeks. To my surprise, he was sinfully drunk when he arrives. As we were going at it, he shits on my white carpet. Now the phrase "f***ing the shit out of someone" has a brand new meaning for me. FML

#8471213
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21501) - you deserved it (5484)

On 02/20/2010 at 5:47am - intimacy - by jo - United States

Today, my dog barked for 30 minutes with me yelling for him to shut up. Guess that's how long it takes someone to steal the rims from my truck. Good dog. FML

#8471153
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6865) - you deserved it (37012)

On 02/20/2010 at 5:36am - animals - by rimjob - United States

Today, I halted a cab. It was 12 degrees and snowing outside. When I went to get in, a man shoved me away and I slipped on ice into dirty snow slush, and he stole my cab. As it drove off, the man flipped me off. FML

#8469374
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31457) - you deserved it (2227)

On 02/20/2010 at 3:20am - misc - by deadandwasted (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while on my graveyard shift at an inner-city backpackers lodge, a drunk pissed in a dorm at 4am. I had to clean up after him, wash all the luggage that got dowsed, clean up 2 separate piles of puke, and help 3 drunken Brits back to their room while they abused me. I have a science degree. FML

#8468411
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26569) - you deserved it (3520)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:29am - work - by underachiever (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after having my bath, I realised that I've gotten so fat that I have to lift up my butt cheeks in order to dry underneath them. FML

#8466183
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9086) - you deserved it (39765)

On 02/20/2010 at 1:09am - health - by fatflabbyfail - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend of two years called me, drunk, telling me how much anal sex hurts with some other guy. FML

#8465985
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28762) - you deserved it (2480)

On 02/20/2010 at 1:04am - intimacy - by VahnSeiro (man) - United States (Texas)

 Today, after flying halfway across the world to see the man I love, he admitted cheating on me several days before I arrived, not only with someone I know, but with someone I hate. FML

#8464823
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28455) - you deserved it (2331)

On 02/20/2010 at 12:30am - love - by izhamilton (woman) - United States (Washington)



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