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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went to the bookstore. While I was in line, I heard everyone talking about how a book cart had gotten loose and rolled down the parking lot into a car, smashing the front. It was my car. FML

#12870608
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28481) - you deserved it (2109)

On 09/02/2010 at 2:10pm - misc - by whatthewoah (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, the elevator broke in my dorm and won't be fixed for several days. I live on the 26th floor. FML

#12870338
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40836) - you deserved it (3730)

On 09/02/2010 at 1:39pm - misc - by flimflam (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a stomach virus. I tried to make myself throw up to feel better. My long nails sliced open my throat from the inside, and I threw up blood. FML

#12869426
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13489) - you deserved it (57732)

On 09/02/2010 at 12:03pm - health - by Sickie. (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after finally getting up the nerve to take my motorcycle to up 75mph on the freeway, I made it off in one piece, only to fall off my bike in the mall parking lot. FML

#12867561
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13912) - you deserved it (24254)

On 09/02/2010 at 7:40am - misc - by hatesgravity (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I'm recovering from abdominal surgery. In addition to pain, I'm having trouble peeing and haven't pooped since Sunday, so my surgeon prescribed a laxative. Turns out I'm allergic to it. Now I'm covered in hives, even in my ears, incisions, and lady parts. I also still haven't pooped. FML

#12866112
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39141) - you deserved it (2677)

On 09/02/2010 at 3:25am - health - by coyote - Japan

Today, I got grounded because I have a picture on facebook in which I'm touching the crotch of a cardboard cut-out of Obama. My parents insist the FBI will see that and I'll end up in jail. My parents are crazy. FML

Today, while browsing facebook I found out that today was my school's class reunion. I was the ONLY one not invited. FML

#12864356
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32063) - you deserved it (4326)

On 09/02/2010 at 12:48am - misc - by anyone (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I fell off my bike. I grazed my knee, shin, thigh, hip, collar bone, shoulder and face. I also strained my wrist. As I was wheeling my bike away, I stung my other leg on nettles. FML

#12861680
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26972) - you deserved it (4284)

On 09/01/2010 at 10:31pm - health - by jodulieu - Sent from mobile version

Today, I talked to my crush for half an hour. It wasn't until I was home that I realised I had some remains of the sausage roll I ate an hour earlier spread all over my teeth. FML

#12860469
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26010) - you deserved it (8138)

On 09/01/2010 at 9:26pm - love - by Rollymouth - Sent from mobile version

Today, my minivan broke down on the side of the highway. I'm out of work and can't afford a cell phone, so I resorted to standing at the back of my van holding a "HELP" sign. About an hour went by, in which time I was passed by a cop car, a firetruck, and a car that said "Roadside Assistance." FML

#12858373
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36002) - you deserved it (3491)

On 09/01/2010 at 7:11pm - misc - by Forded (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

#12858268
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31858) - you deserved it (4188)

On 09/01/2010 at 7:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw one of those candies that you spray on your tongue. Only after spraying some in my mouth did I find it was actually perfume. FML

#12856829
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8517) - you deserved it (42656)

On 09/01/2010 at 5:01pm - misc - by samboob (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after almost a week of being bed-ridden with a bad flu, my mom told me it was my job to clean the house. When I told her I still had a fever and didn't feel well, she looked at me and said in an understanding voice "It's okay honey, you can do it slowly." FML

#12852856
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32148) - you deserved it (4920)

On 09/01/2010 at 10:41am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)



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