Today, I was in lying in bed with my boyfriend while he was asleep. He is going to school to be a doctor, and it appears that he says anatomical terms while asleep. My boyfriend can make me feel stupid in his sleep. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML
Today, I discovered that I sometimes talk in my sleep. After spending an amazing, perfectly romantic night with my boyfriend, I woke up to him telling me to leave. I have no idea what I could have said. He still won't talk to me. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making the bed, at 2 AM. And he wasn't so much making the bed as he was holding a pillow while lost in thought, looking at me. FML
Today, I was in one of those lucid half sleeps with my boyfriend. Not fully awake to control myself, I ripped ass. I had no idea what to do. I pretended to still be sleeping. I'm pretty sure he noticed because he patted me on the back in a congratulatory sort of way. FML
Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarrhea in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping body. He rolled over to whisper, "I heard everything." FML
Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML
Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML
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Top comments
KiwiExchange 16
That's pretty badass.
taoxyeuxmay 4
Your boyfriend sounds like a cutie pie!
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Comments (126)
CoachLlama 5
ok, ok, you love him, he is smart. blah blah blah. aww so cute. Hope ya'll have pretty babies. Good luck. fml.
Zebidee 9
Wow. That's one pretty serious insecurity complex you've got there. Knowing someone that's smarter than you doesn't mean you're all of a sudden dumber. If this is the way you're thinking while he's still in school, maybe you should get out now and start working on your own life, so that you can bring something positive to your next relationship.
iltby 3
They're just words he has to know to complete his degree, I don't really understand why that makes you feel dumb.
iheartglasses 0
Shut up and make his breakfast. His job will put food on the table and a nice car in the driveway. If you have a complex, study the same or find a nice hobby
always_smile_fml 3
this is a shit post
NoMoreRainbows 0
YDI for being stupid
r3qu1em 0
a true funny fml...very refreshing OP. FYL.
luvzit 0
or smart? lol you could use them smart words when his awake, he will be impressed.
Metalguitar30 0
that's cus you are stupid.
lostfaithinpppl 19
OP you are indeed stupid if in order to feel smart you need to surround yourself with stupid people.