Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML
Today, I was woken up at 4 in the morning by my boyfriend farting on my leg and giggling in his sleep. For the third time. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I woke myself up by farting in my sleep, only to realize that the guy I'd brought home from the bar was still next to me. He was awake. FML
Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years-old. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML
Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML
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Top comments
AmeOwl 0
Movie's like twilight have truly corrupted girls' ability to separate fiction from reality. In reality world, even a guy in love is probably not going to sit there staring at his girlfriend while she sleeps. And that's good, because it's kind of creepy.
Kingdutch 3
That's one unexpected answer
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Comments (71)
Kingdutch 3
That's one unexpected answer
life_goes_onnn 0
omg so sad hahahah YDI for farting while u sleep and being self-obsessed!!! :P
lil_ham1644 29
You probably fart in your sleep too. & where does it say anything about being self obsessed?
RedMiniStapler 1
that's funny. take some beano?
Rayn4u_fml 0
Stupid questions deserve stupid answers ^^
MagicMeds 0
this! why do women ask such stupid things?!
lostfaithinpppl 19
OP, stop farting!
MoonyIce 0
Seriously? "Are you staring at me because you're in love?" The fact that YDI is THAT much sweeter because you felt the need to ask that.
Skull_300 0
Next time wait until he ******* falls asleep and then give him a Dutch Oven!!!
SillyPoop 0
I would have farted again after him saying that and said "oh" then roll over and go back to sleep!
DarkKnyte 0
Fishing for compliments will get you pwned. :D
AmeOwl 0
Movie's like twilight have truly corrupted girls' ability to separate fiction from reality. In reality world, even a guy in love is probably not going to sit there staring at his girlfriend while she sleeps. And that's good, because it's kind of creepy.
Peroxide 3
I love living in reality world with my reality house, reality car and reality dog. Everything looks so real!!
SeriouslySad 0
Actually, my boyfriend watches me sleep all the time. But then again, he also compares himself to Edward Cullen a lot.
alexandraa_fml 0
Agree with Kay.
melissa_10 7
awww..thats cute!
lil_cig 0
Hell yeah it's creepy! Kinda reminds me of the movie 'Paranormal Activity' :o
Rachelgrl1989 0
The world is not Twilight. That's one good thing about the world.
CallMeHush 1
That stinks.
SillyPoop 0
hehe Double meaning...stinky!