Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML
Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML
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Top comments
hobosapien081 10
in all fairness, he WAS asleep...
alpaquette91 9
Awww he loves you too!
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Comments (165)
hobosapien081 10
in all fairness, he WAS asleep...
gmny 1
I agree you probably do it too when you sleep.
YtotsDI 0
.
hotPinklipstick 24
A person can't control what they do in their sleep. What were you expecting, for him to wake up from his peaceful sleep just to respond?
akayc32 0
What is it you're trying to say, 17?
Gema2dicks 0
Awww isn't he just precious? c:
hotPinklipstick 24
.
hotPinklipstick 24
Sorry about 37, my iPhone has a mind of it's own...
tona01 16
It is kind of a rule. Everytime someone says something lovely to someone who is sleeping, the person sleeping will ruin that precious and peacefull moment by snoring real loud, hogging the sheets, or letting a very smelly and loud fart.
kyarush 10
Get pooped on
EvilPotato 15
1 thats what OP thinks.
HomeAl0ne 20
Yep, let sleeping dogs lie.
alpaquette91 9
Awww he loves you too!
Eggers 2
sleeping with your boyfriend (cough) keyword "boyfriend" he doesn't love you
Llama_Face89 34
40- so they're supposed to be ******* like rabbits 24/7? I'm assuming that's what you were insinuating. Sex isn't the only way to express love for a person. And it is necessary to sleep once in a while.
flockz 20
this is the first time i have ever imagined rabbits *******. now i can't stop thinking about bugs bunny...
alpaquette91 9
40 let me just say, op never said ANYTHING about sleeping WITH him she said he was sleeping who says they where sleeping together, or living together.
Yodaevil 4
He just wanted to blow a kiss back!
fatgirllovesfml 0
Rabbits don't **** 24/7, silly.
ambamm135 7
Best comment of the day! ^
EvilPotato 15
53 I'm picturing a very strange mental image now.
EvilPotato 15
125 I'm picturing bugs bunny having sex with the Tasmanian devil, while roasting a turkey made out of wax.
jellyshoes11 4
I agree with #1 I hate being bothered when I'm asleep.
XxREXxX 0
thats a sexy guys way of saying thank you
McMike10 1
Did you expect him to say "I love you too"?
xmayne 0
How did this post make it on here?
False_Stupidity 42
He DID say "I love you too" but it was in secret fart code which only guys can understand...
Egnar 19
He's asleep by YOUR OWN admission - what did you expect for him to do express his undying love for you through mumbles and sleep talking?. . .People do gross bodily things in their sleep, get over it.
hotPinklipstick 24
I don't see how this makes your life "******" a person can't control what they do in their sleep. What were you expecting, for him to wake up from his peaceful sleep just to respond??
Doortje 30
In fart-language, that means "I love you too".
urdirtyolduncle 15
*Farts ferociously on Doortje's face*
HomeAl0ne 20
It was probably Morse code. One long 'dash' means 'T', which doesn't make sense. You need to record it and slow it down 100x, then you will pick up the discrete dots and dashes that spell out an amazing love poem. Or not.
False_Stupidity 42
His farts were trying to communicate with her, but being female she just couldn't 'crack' the code.
Jujubilee 1
Lol! Do not disturb!!!
ollie179 21
Your so handsome
ollie179 21
My iPhone deleted most of my sentence :3 A thousand apologies.
fatraptorjesus13 9
her so handsome what?
Skittlepickle 13
Then what was the rest?!
ollie179 21
Your so handsome