Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarrhea in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping body. He rolled over to whisper, "I heard everything." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
The trumpets of doom
Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML
Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Top comments
AliSama 17
that is not a bad thing. People get sick and everyone goes to the bathroom.
csigabajnok 0
So what? He thought girls never do the "poop" thing or a female fart is just a myth? Wake up, son!
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Comments (160)
AliSama 17
that is not a bad thing. People get sick and everyone goes to the bathroom.
judea95 16
Exactly. Sometimes it can't be avoided
OMGhi2YOU 0
i am so sorry but i havent laughed that hard in a while. but im sorry. it happens.
MEF62 5
your face is so hilarious. please, please stop making that face! it's hideous!
alimayBVB182 0
That was sorta rude
csigabajnok 0
So what? He thought girls never do the "poop" thing or a female fart is just a myth? Wake up, son!
ualbany86 0
lol yeah that just embarrassing as hell
bioclock 0
Not FML unless he dumped you. But wow, that's embarassing.
skullcandifiedDJ 5
he didn't dump her, he just HEARD her take a dump...
muse88 0
that sux!!! wut did you say in response??
Kyothine 0
Not that bad unless he dumped you, like the guy above said.
marris 0
lol. but yeah like number 7. He could have said "i heard everything, get out." Or "i heard everything, lets see if you can top that next time you get up"
drybamboo 0
I guess you haven't been together for a while. This is nothing to people in long-term relationships. It's a little creepy that he would actually say that he heard everything.
twinkle_nipso_O 0
ditto!
elcsw1002 0
hahaha sucks :]